5G Microwaves and the Vaccine cooked the Christmas turkey. While this may seem very convenient there are worrying connotations.

It is a tradition that I always cook the traditional Christmas roast, I put it in the fridge and was looking forward to cooking and presenting it to my family the next day. Well, on Christmas morning I was flabbergasted to find that...sorry, this is so upsetting...I found that the turkey had already been cooked by the 5g rays that big pharma have been pointing at my house. Also, it was half eaten so this turkey must have been given the COVID vax and this had eaten it away leaving only half. My immediate concern was my family so I rushed upstairs to warn my wife. My wife told me that it was not Christmas day anymore it was actually boxing day. She also said that I could not remember eating the dinner as I was so drunk because I had drunk the whole punch bowl by myself and had been sick all aver Auntie Edna. I was taken aback, you could have knocked me over with a feather. Why would my wife tell such lies, do you think she is in league with 5G, big pharma and the illuminati?