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If you walked by a random person seated on a bench, and noticed them crying, would you…

Poll - Total Votes: 29
Walk by pretending not to notice
Say hello but continue walking
Pause and speak to them
Stop, sit and offer to be with them for a moment
Show Results
You can only vote on one answer.
SW-User
Id be concerned and ask them if they're ok

Well but I did once that in a park but nobody did anything and I'm glad they didn't, but maybe if someone that seemed friendly approached I would have been thankful 🤔
DeWayfarer · 61-69, M
Guys are in a difficult position when it comes to women in that type of situation. Often I know have to just walk on by knowing that most women would think I am attempting to come on to them.

Yet the situation is reversed when I see a girl is being harassed. That happened to a young girl, and I know she was grateful that I did intervene. I actually talked to her for awhile after the jerk left. Asked her if she was ok now and politely excused myself.
vetguy1991 · 51-55, M
Not sure, they might simply need some time alone
@vetguy1991 how do you know unless you ask?
vetguy1991 · 51-55, M
Axelerator · 31-35, M
I’ve tried this multiple times actually. I tend to politely ask if they’re ok, without pushing. Sometimes people clearly just want you to leave, but other times it’s clear that the person would like someone to talk to, even for a couple of mins
@Axelerator Do you listen? Or do you offer advice? Do you call them a cop out?
Axelerator · 31-35, M
@DesertFlower Well I’d obviously listen first, and then maybe offer advice, if I thought it would be helpful to them.

Hmmm strange, are you indirectly offended about the one time I used that term on this site?
On a recent post where someone was justifying leaving their children behind because of poor logic and self pity.
That was a cop out, even if that sounds offensive.
I can sympathize a great deal with someone suffering and wanting to end themselves, but that doesn’t mean it’s always right or justified. And I’m not going to lie to someone considering it, just to spare their feelings.

You know what they say about assuming right?
@Axelerator did you not assume they were coping out? Did you try to understand?

I observe a lot.

I see very hurt people in this world and on this site, I see how people react to them. I try to understand why someone is so hurt and why someone would assume the worst of them without even knowing what they’ve been through.

I am trying to understand human nature. And what I observe is that people say they are kind and they care, but in practice, your judgment hits the person long before your kind intentions. Many people are that way.

I am trying to understand what it’s like for people to be who they are, not who I think they should be.
That can be tough. Never when I was crying did I ever want a stranger to stop and talk to me. In those moments it’s best to leave me alone. But not all people would react like me. I would ask if they are okay or need help. If they seem they would rather be alone, I would let them be.
Piper · 61-69, F
I would pause and probably, based on past experiences, ask them if they were "okay". A pretty dumb thing to ask someone who sitting on a bench crying, of course.

What I did after that, would depend upon how they reacted to my admittedly dumb question.
cycleman · 61-69, M
I've done that and I just want to be left alone.
When I walk past a lady, I'll ask if she'd like to talk, and all the time I get the headshake or no response. I keep going.
FrozenWasteland · 61-69, M
I would ask quietly, once, if they wanted an ear.

Some people would like company, others would prefer to be alone..
WaafaS · 26-30, F
I'd look, but probably keep walking.
Kumar007 · 36-40, M
@WaafaS surely ill interrupt
exexec · 61-69, C
I always speak and ask if they need help.
Whodunnit · M
I'd walk on by. It's far too easy these days to get dragged into situations, have people make assumptions, and/or be accused of things.

Unless I know them then it's not my problem, and I don't intend for it to BECOME my problem.
If it was a woman i might offer to buy her an icecream, or coffee etc. in an attempt to cheer her up. If it was a guy id snicker as i passed on by.
@666Maggotz gross? Obviously i wouldn't know why the tears, so to help a lady cheer up, id offer a polite distraction, if it was a guy i could care less.
I want to think that I would stop and sit with them for a moment. But so often ive walked past, it feels personal and private and i'm a stranger.
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
Walk by, I don't think I could help in any way.

 
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