Any suggestion on how I could acquire $500K legally given that I have nothing but my wit and wisdom for leverage?

@Goralski: this is a fair point

I would prefer a dick free method of acquiring the cash..

@Sunujing: You could sell a leg or arm they are good money and should get you half way there and you don't need that kidney

@Firespirit: you are delivering practical suggestions

@kingfish2: yes

@Sunujing: Invest your money.

@Antiquity: nice suggestion but methinks my GF would not approve and I do really love her

@badazzbasicbich: challenging to walk the fine line of legality and I am not that charming

@Wildcard20: not legal though

@crabbyhermit: fair, not illegal in many states now

Exactly, only on the federal level. Which is ridiculous that they won't legalize it