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THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU MOVE TO THE APPALACHIANS.

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW IF YOU MOVE TO THE APPALACHIANS.
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. Onced and Twiced are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!
7. Jawl-P? means: Did you all go to the bathroom?
8. People actually grow, eat, and like okra.
9. Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do something.
10. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.
12. Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.
13. The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.
16. Y'all is singular. All Y'all is plural.
17. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.
18. You carry jumper cables in your car for your OWN car.
19. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco, and ketchup.
20. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, motorsports, and gossip.
21. Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss (first name), or Mr (first name)
22. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
23. You know what a hissy fit is..
24. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
25. We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!
26. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Appalachian friends and those who just wish they were from the Appalachians.
AND one more:
27. Why did the chicken cross the road? To show that stupid possum that it CAN be done!
Read:- https://koppiz.com/parents-write-fids-25-hilarious-notes/

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Sapio · 51-55, M
I love me some fried catfish with cornbread.
Mountainlady16 · 22-25, F
28. Yes ma'am i know my kids are outside running around barefoot and in a diaper or their underwear did you need anything else to tell my business they're 6 and under. My kids never go out this way but I driven down enough rural areas and seen kids doing this.
Ethnic slurs and stereotyping. If this post were about Harlem or Watts, it would be deleted immediately.
@lasergraph You are missing the point. If this post were about Harlem or Watts, it would be deleted immediately. Jeff Foxworthy would be erased and banned from society.
lasergraph · 70-79, M
@NoThanksLeon I got your point the first time. Like I said I am from the south and we don't get butt hurt over someone poking fun. If I made you cry I am sorry.
@lasergraph I'm in the Appalachians, and it's because of people like you that we are living in the United States of Africa.
SalttyDawg · 70-79, M
If you are a married couple from West Virginia, even though you get a divorce you are still brother and sister 😁
Mountainlady16 · 22-25, F
@SalttyDawg that's disgusting
wildbill83 · 36-40, M
when you're at a restaurant and someone orders unsweetened tea...

MethDozer · M
. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, motorsports, and gossip

It's the same in NNY. The amount of news coverage High school sports gets around here is insane and kind of annoying. The Yankees can be playing Boston in the World Series and you won't get the score on the news or the paper but you'll know the score of every junior modified girls field hockey and boys intermural HS bowling team score for the entire trip county area.


It's weird as heck coming from a normal place where nobody cares about high school sports except parents with a kid on a team

 
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