Tell me funny ways to answer the telephone?

Here is one to get you going.

Human's Sperm bank. You smack it, we pack it. How can I direct your call?

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ChipmunkErnie · 70-79, M Best Comment

Back in the 1960s I knew a girl who'd answer the phone, "ABC Abortions -- you make 'em, we rake 'em, no fetus can beat us."

HumanEarth · F

You win, the best comment award. That's funny