Title too short and all that....😂🤣The Jokes thread(Collections)

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Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
I'm terrified of elevators so I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them.
Have you heard of the band 923 Megabytes? Probably not, they haven't had a gig yet.

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TheSirfurryanimalWales · 61-69, M

Great news, Mr. Bradley," the psychiatrist reported. "After eighteen months
of therapy, I can pronounce you finally and completely cured of your
kleptomania. You'll never be trapped by the desire to steal again."

"Gee, that's great, Doc," the patient replied.

"And just to prove it, I want you to stop by the mall on the way home and
walk the length of the stores. You'll see that you'll feel no temptation to
shoplift whatsoever."

"Oh, Doctor, what can I do to thank you?"

"Well," suggested the psychiatrist, "if you DO have a relapse, I could use a
new TV."

Thinkerbell · 41-45, F

@TheSirfurryanimalWales

"And to be on the safe side," the doctor continued, "steal the TV in Los Angeles; the D.A. there doesn't prosecute."