Proofreading is a dying art, wouldn't say you?
Seen in a Shopping center bathroom:
The toilet is out of order. Please use floor below.
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In a Laundromat:
Automatic washing machines: Please remove your clothes when the light goes out.
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In a Department store:
Bargain Basement Upstairs.
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In an office:
Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken!
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In an office:
After coffee break, staff should empty the coffee pot and stand upside down on the draining board.
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Outside a secondhand shop:
We exchange everything! Bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring the wife along and get a wonderful bargain?
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Notice in a Health Food shop window:
Closed due to illness.
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Spotted in a safari park:
Elephants, please stay in your car!
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Seen in a conference room:
For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a daycare center on the first floor.
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Notice in a farmer's field:
The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges!
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Message on a bulletin board:
If you can not read, this will tell you how to get lessons.
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On a repair shop door:
We can repair anything! (Please knock on the door hard. The bell doesn't work.)
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(This one was published in a newspaper. The Editorial Room was informed by the readers, but it took three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.)
Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter.
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Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
(Really? Ya think?)
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Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers.
(Now that's taking things a bit far!)
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Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over.
(What a guy!)
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Miners Refuse to Work after Death.
(Those no-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's!)
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Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant.
(See if that works any better than a fair trial!)
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War Dims Hope for Peace.
(I can see where it might have that effect!)
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If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
(Ya think?!)
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Cold Wave Linked to Lower Temperatures.
(Who would have thought!)
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Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
(They may be on to something!)
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Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges.
(You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?)
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Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge.
(He probably IS the battery charge!)
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Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft.
(That's what he gets for eating those beans!)
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Kids Make Nutritious Snacks.
(Do they taste like chicken?)
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Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half.
(Chainsaw Massacre all over again!)
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Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors.
(Boy, are they tall!)
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Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead.
(Did I read that right?)
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And the winner is....
If it's in stock... we have it.
