Title too short and all that....😂🤣The Jokes thread(Collections)

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Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
I'm terrified of elevators so I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them.
Have you heard of the band 923 Megabytes? Probably not, they haven't had a gig yet.

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TheSirfurryanimalWales · 61-69, M

A painter walks up to a church and offers to paint it. The church manager agrees. Business isn’t going well for the painter so he decides to save some money by adding water to thin the paint. He’s gets a few days in and a massive storm appears out of nowhere with lightning and thunder crashing around him. A booming voice comes from the clouds, “How dare you steal from my church”. The painter screams out, “Lord I’m so sorry, what can I do to save myself?”. The booming voice responds, “Repaint, repaint and thin no more!”

Thinkerbell · 41-45, F

@TheSirfurryanimalWales

God doesn't have a lisp !