Not happy about being sick on March 8th

March 8th 2024 is the day I had gotten sick. I was admitted into the hospital because of a seizure. I usually do not have to be admitted into the hospital when this happen but I guess this particular time was different. I was nervous about this month coming because like me my dad's birthday was this month too just and mine was yesterday. Right now I feel that I have no one to talk with other than my mom and brother. I am sad but I am trying to upbeat because I do not want to be a patient in the medical hospital again and I do not want to start on another seizure medicine.

I did not want neither my mom nor my brother to leave me. I don't have many friends, the friend I did have is living in California or I have no idea of her whereabouts. We grew up in elementary school. I had searched the computer for this friend but had no luck. I remember the last time I had spoke to her on the phone in 2006, she sent me a letter saying that I had said something that hurt her feelings. I wrote her 3 times asking what did I say but I did not receive a reply from her. One time I had went to job interview and while I was gone, I was hoping she received my letter and was planning to write me back. When I called home, I was told by my brother and mom that my letter came back with a yellow sticker stating that she did not want me to write anymore and do not send anymore letters. When he said that I wondered what did I say? for her to be mad at me like that.

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FrogManSometimesLooksBothWays · M

It sounds like you are going through a challenging time both physically and emotionally. Dealing with health issues, particularly seizures, can be incredibly difficult, especially when it leads to hospitalization. The fear and uncertainty surrounding your health, compounded by the isolation from friends and the unresolved tension with a childhood friend, likely weighs heavily on your mind.

The fact that you feel you have limited support, primarily from your mother and brother, highlights the importance of social connections during times of distress. It's clear that you long for more companionship and understanding, especially considering the absence of your friend who you've tried to reconnect with to no avail.

The rejection from your friend, as indicated by the returned letters, adds another layer of hurt and confusion to your already complicated emotions. Not knowing what you did to cause the rift likely exacerbates feelings of guilt and sadness.

Overall, it's evident that you are struggling with a combination of physical illness, emotional distress, and a sense of loneliness. Finding ways to cope with these challenges and seeking support from their family, or perhaps even professional help, could help you navigate through this difficult period in their life.

Good luck and stay well! ❤️

taLking5 · 51-55, F

@FrogManSometimesLooksBothWays my family (mom and brother) is doing all they could to be a support to me. My other family live in other states other than we do, we are the only ones here in this state but we are a great support to each other.) My mom was at the hospital when I got sick, she wanted to stay at the hospital with me. They would not let her stay at the hospital with me, instead they made my mom lay on a bed outside of my ER room until they took me upstairs. They called my brother her at home and asked him to call a cab and have them to pick my mom up because she was very upset. What they did not understand about my mom, she was just as scared because she remembers that I never had to be admitted into the hospital because of a seizure and she is used to leaving the hospital with me instead of leaving me behind. After I came home Thursday March 10, 2024, I felt depressed when I came home. I am not too much of an emotional person but I had been crying a lot since I've been home and do not have much of an appetite. I feel at times I have to force myself to eat. I believe I am coming back each and everyday. This is another thing with me, I was never affected like this because of a seizure.

The other sad thing in my life is the the fact that most of the people we knew had left our lives one way or the other. Meaning, Some moved away and some had died. When I began having seizures in 1992, my sister had blamed my mom for me having seizures, I did not agree with what my sister.

Jessmari · 41-45

Dealing with seizures without support is a scary thought. Not to mention dangerous. I hope you can find the support you need.

Try to keep your stress levels down as well. In fact try to cut them out if you can. Things like that can play in your head over and over while in a seizure making them worse.

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taLking5 · 51-55, F

@twiigss I was normal until the year 1992, I was 23 or 24 years old. When I first began taking Dilantin I was put on 3 tablets. Then I had a few more seizures after that. When I had the seizures, I was not admitted into the hospital, they tested to see if I could walk then let me rest in the ER bed then sent me home. This time I was hospitalized and my right arm is feels like it has tingles in it but I have strength in it. I was told that some people would experience numbness, weakness or whatever after a seizure.

My problem was I was not sleeping much, maybe 3 or 4 hours a night. There were times I forgot to take my pills and then there were times I forgot that I forgot to that I had taken my pills. And I was not eating much either. I was sadden because of reasons, I was sadden over the fact I had lost many people I used to know and I had lost pets and etc. I am trying to get back into the swing of things. I never knew how to drive but right when I was considering it when I was in my 20s, I got this stupid disorder.

taLking5 · 51-55, F

@twiigss The same thing happened to me. I had a normal life until 1992. Before seizures, I worked and was an active person. At the time, I planned to drive because I wanted to be independent. When I first began having seizures, they kept me in the hospital for 4 days because they did not have any idea why I began having seizures. I had a MRI test and other tests but the results came back cleared, nothing was found. I remember a few years before that I had playfully bumped my head on the top bunk bed I had, it wasn't a hard hit and I did not think anything about it. At the time my sister accused my mom of causing them so today whenever I have one, my mom would instantly feel guilty about it. When I came home on March 8, 2024, my mom watched my every move. She kept saying that she is sorry for causing me to be sick. No matter what I say, my mom still believe she caused it.

twiigss · M

@taLking5 I honestly think it's something we ate or some unknown, outside force that is the cause.

I can still work and drive and still on medication.

JamesBugman · 56-60, T

I am always around for chat if you feel like it. I know nothing about seizures, but maybe we can find a topic that is mutual. :)

smileylovesgaming · 31-35, F

Kind of strange to message someone out of the blue after 18 year's

taLking5 · 51-55, F

@smileylovesgaming what do you mean? when you said it is strange to message someone out of the blue after 18 years? :)

AccursedAlexander3 · 31-35, M

You forgot to add be.

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