Anxious
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4th day... but here is the relapse.

I feel awful today. (And all my toxic thoughts are rushing to my mind like a flood)

I left work later than other workers... and I am still finishing at home.
What is wrong with me?
I tried everything.
New methods of organizing.

My friend at work tells me I give more efforts than them and work harder that's why I stay late. I can hardly believe her and I keep blaming myself.

I have no idea what to think of me...

I might have become slower at work because depression and anxiety are catching up to me due to the switch of cycles in my bp2... but not that much !

I don't know what to think anymore. Now I have constructed this idea in my head that I've become slow and I'm afraid if I keep thinking about it too much I might get worse.

People are dealing with worse and here I am getting myself worked up like this for this. Damn.

Ps: be kind in your response if you are willing to respond, I know this all seems like exageration but it is really getting to me.
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Coworkers always let You know how You are doing at work, your friend should be believed :)
Friendlyperson · 26-30, F
@NativePortlander1970 I am having the hardest time believing her. I will call her later today because we just exchanged messages.
@Friendlyperson I would believe her
Friendlyperson · 26-30, F
@NativePortlander1970 We talked in the phone, we concluded that I was exhausted and that's way I'm taking too much time doing stuff... but she said that I'm usually a hardworker...
@Friendlyperson Exhaustion could be a very large part of it.
Friendlyperson · 26-30, F
@NativePortlander1970 I am giving myselfa challenge of sleeping early (normal range would be at 10pm or if I get late that would be 11pm...) so I'm trying to do my best regarding the sleeping cycle...
But the mental exhaustion from work is something I should really find a solution to... and taking a vacation is unfortunately not a option now
@Friendlyperson Do You have a zoo nearby or a museum? Those are both great for mental resets, or even a light hearted comedy at the theater.