To parents: When did you feel the parental instinct kick in?

This is a really interesting question, but also a difficult one to answer. I want to answer it though.

I became pregnant 3 years ago when I was 19. In fact, this time 3 years ago I was just a couple weeks from finding out about my pregnancy. It was strange because at first I felt excited...but then a week or so later I started to feel doubtful, and I felt confused too. This is to the extent that only my boyfriend knew about my pregnancy for a long time, literally until I started showing and half of it was over. I had strongly considered getting an abortion but, for whatever reason, couldn't go through with it. Now I am very much against abortion. At the time I didn't know or understand what the reason was. At 20 weeks (a month before I told people) I was feeling my baby start to move. I was aware, and something was happening. It was a slow process for me though. I had told myself that I wouldn't bond with him, and that I'd probably be a horrible parent.

He was due in April 2020, and by February of that year I had started buying clothes and other essentials for him. That seemed to signify some change and I began to be more interested. Some very devastating events happened in my family, which made it a more complicated time for me. When I gave birth to my son, I felt empty...lost, bewildered and I couldn't fully grasp what had happened. I felt like I was in another universe, or just not in this realm. I persevered and did the things you are supposed to do, though.

Anyway, we were coming home from the hospital when I felt this overwhelming sense of concern about people driving behind us as I thought that if we got into an accident, it would hurt my son who is just a tiny baby. As I was sat in the back with him, I kept looking for other cars.

The next time I felt similar feelings was when I gave him his first bath at home. I thought the water was too cold, then too hot, and it concerned me deeply. When I did bring him out of it, I couldn't wait to put clothes back on him again in case he got cold. From there, it still took time for me but I got more and more, and more attached to him. I started to feel how a mom would feel.

With my daughter, this has really been magnified. From the time I found out about her I was extremely attached and very ready. I cried when I gave birth to her, and I find myself constantly worrying about her. With both of my children, it feels like my heart beats for them. They are everything to me, and bring so much joy. They make me feel like there is hope for myself, and there is this strong inclination to avoid the bad and pursue the good...for them.

Mine was there before my daughter was even born. After she was born, it scared me that I was responsible for her. That only lasted a day.

You’re right, some people don’t get that instinct and they really shouldn’t become parents. 😔

Since the moment they laid my baby boy on my chest I split into multiple people. There will always be a part of me that is on the lookout, protecting, watching and ready to joyfully kill anyone that would hurt him. I think about it sometimes and giggle. That primal mama madness is always ready for action. I would rip someone apart.

We are a big family and there was always younger kids around. I was an aunt at 14 and adored my little nephew.. and the nephews and niece that followed in quick succession. I only really thought about if id have my own when my boyfriend proposed when i was 22. I had to ask him if he wanted kids....coz i knew i did. Thankfully he did, but we waited a few years after we married. As soon i knew i was expecting i became instantly aware everything i did would impact my baby. Id have done anything to keep it safe. He was born by c section and the guilt i felt was awful. I felt failed him.

Id still fight to the death for my kids now they are in their 20s.

I can't say exactly when. Didn't take long after the first baby was born. I discovered that the biggest dread in life was something happening to that child. Doesn't go away when they are full-grown. Then you live in dread that something will happen to their spouse or child, as well.

My daughter's mom got herself into some bad habits, i realized i could no longer have faith that she would always put them in a good position, is when i changed into a better parent for them. Not that i was ever a bad parent, just rather passive in my parenting.

Soon the first was born I guess. Or maybe before. I always wanted kids

Now my three adult children live at home and 4 grandchildren live at home. It’s crazy here

Soon as I found out I was pregnant.

As soon as I became a mom.

This post hits home.
How can a young mother of two babies just fucking walk away? I didn't think it possible.
🤷‍♀️😔😢💔

it only came about a day after he was born when he first held onto my finger with his tiny hand. up till that point and all the way through the pregnancy I was worried I did not feel those feelings as much but the instant he held tight on my finger, it was instant.
That moment right there changed my life and it became clear his life means so so much more than mine and I am here to make sure he is safe and well provided for

Moment I held her in my arms less than a minute after birth

And some people have it towards all children.

I think Ryan Reynolds said it best before he had children he would have thrown himself front of a bullet to save his wife. Once he held those precious little children in his arms he knew he would push his wife in front and duck behind her body just to save their lives.

Probably the first ultrasound where they suddenly looked like a little, person-shaped thing. 🤭 I think before that I was still in shock. Lol.. that was the beginning of this intense feeling to move heaven and earth, so to speak, for their well-being.

I don't have kids (nor do I want any), but I've had maternal instincts since forever. Probably due to a lot of babysitting from a very early age (7 y/o)

For my adopted son it was when I saw his photo

My heart flopped and I felt this hormonal rush

I would do anything for this baby

At the time adoption was really fraught and we were told to never forget that our moment of joy was another woman's greatest pain - as if we would be insensitive to that

But we were shown the photo by a social worker who I hadn't met before and she looked me in the face then grabbed my hamd and squeezed it saying to me with this urgency, " this little baby doesn't have parents and he really deserves parents. Never forget you are it

😭😭😭😭😭