Why do most people try to keep me away from my mother?

My family and friends warned me about staying with my mother and how she only thinks of herself. She never calls, return calls, did drugs in the past and breaks promises. I always wanted my mother but she never wants me. My mom told me the real reason why she walked out on is. It's because I had a disability and she didn't want a disabled child. She said I was a mistake. I'm trying to make things work but it just didnt wrk out! I'll never get my mom to parent me. I want my mother!! I can't stay with her! I guess that's why my dad kept trying to keep me from my mother and he said I don't need her and she doesn't care about us.
I love mom but she doesn't love me as a daughter at all. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I'm going home Sunday morning. Should I give up on my mom? I can't even talk to her or look at her anymore.