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I am almost 36 weeks pregnant and I am still not getting over not wanting others to hold the baby when she gets here.

As my due date is getting closer and closer I am still not getting over this thing of not wanting others to hold my baby. The thought of others holsing the baby is freaking me out and making me feel uncomfortable. Its just for the first couple of weeks.Despite of being close with my family in law. Am i crazy?

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pdqsailor1 · 61-69, M

We have dogs... What you have to know about the dogs is that they truly adore and LOVE me - it happens to be mutual....Well when our Female gave birth last time to a single puppy... and her mate woke me up to tell me - very exited Dad... I saw her single male pup for the first time curled up at her side happily nursing and she looked at me and growled softly - but she meant it... He is MINE - don't come any closer please... it did not take too long for her to allow me to pick him up and say hello but her first instincts were that NO one is going any where near her baby...

So you ask are you crazy?

No... it is normal and not to feel as you do would be crazy...

You know we think we are so much smarter because we can reason - but it is not true - we have to recognize who we are and what we are to understand how we feel about things...

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@pdqsailor1 thanks for your comment. Helps alot

DreamingOfSummer · 26-30, F

I think they just call that maternal instinct.

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pdqsailor1 · 61-69, M

Of course - the hormones kick in, You make like you think you have a choice in this... you do not - it is how we are WIRED to behave in this instance. I invented a methodology of controlling wild animals - patent and everything... Ever read about a Mother bear protecting its cubs? You think this is an accident? Trust me it is NOT an accident and our most PRIMAL primitive wild animalistic nature comes out - in situations like giving birth - the protective nature of a MOTHER is not controllable - anyone who thinks differently is going to have a very rude awakening... This is NORMAL.... No amount of school, university, intellect can control this...
@WildwoodFlower

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@pdqsailor1 thanks for your comment...yes it is true...ive been dealing with hormones for months now..lol. i was just rewachting a show and cried for the characters...

pdqsailor1 · 61-69, M

The procreation of the species.. the need to reproduce is a PRIMAL directive - in the bible in Genesis it is the first of 613 commandments - be fruitful and multiply... but all animals including man (and of course Woman) are wired not only to make that baby but to protect and DEFEND that baby - to the point of giving up your own life to do so... serious stuff... understanding that this is natural and NORMAL makes it easier to accept and no amount of REASON is going to change the way you feel - you feel this way for a very valid reason and purpose - you are supposed to feel this way... @WildwoodFlower

EllaDisenchanted · F

No,the first month or so is a period of heavy bonding between baby,daddy and mommy. Very natural. It's really a western habit for people to assume they have the right to hold your child or touch your belly. Just tell people nicely that you'd like your space. If they can't handle,oh well.

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WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@EllaDisenchanted ive been reading that a lot and i may use that as an excuse...its just going to be hard for me because everyone is so close but i dont want to do anything i am not comfortable with...

EllaDisenchanted · F

@WildwoodFlower Being upfront and polite usually does go a long way. Just make sure you do let others have time after a while. Going overly protective is as bad as not at all.

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@EllaDisenchanted yes i get what you mean. Well its not like i dont want others to hold her up untill she ia not a baby anymore. Its just for the firsf few weeks...i dont want to be overpretective but i do want my boundaries for the first weeks and for then to be respected...

BlueRain · F

You are not crazy! I didn’t want anyone holding my baby. Just tell them it’s post partum depression and your doctor told you not to let anyone hold the baby.

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@BlueRain omg! Does that work? Im really considering it now....have you suffered PPD?

Rob04 · 18-21, M

You need to make it clear to others no one should hold your baby. Speaking to them NOW is ideal. Good luck on being a mum for future :)

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@Rob04 thanks rob!

TexChik · F

Hormones ... don’t worry ... it will pass . And you and your baby will be just fine

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@TexChik thanks. Did you have the same thing? The thing is that i know i will get critized for being overpretective blablabla...i just want to do what makes me feel comfortable. I have a good relationahip with my family in law...also with my mom in law although she sonetimes can be a little too overbearing..its her first grandchild

unknownpoetx · 36-40, M

this is why you should always use protection

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@unknownpoetx well..this baby was planned so now...we didnt use protection....what a weird thing to say btw

SW-User

cool

SW-User

It sounds like maternal instinct gone overboard towards ocd. What about the doctors and nurses?

WildwoodFlower · 31-35, F

@SW-User obviously this doesnt count for the medical staff

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