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For those of you who are divorced what happened?

Who decided it was time to divorce? Did you have a seperation first? What is your divorce story? How many times have you been divorced?
QueenOfZaun · 26-30, F
I wasn’t divorced but I was engaged to be married.

He was a total deadbeat and could not hold a job to save his life. Every time he quit a job or was fired; he told me he would change.

I finally decided to stop believing him and we broke up.

He wasn’t a bad guy, he treated me well. He was simply very dumb and self destructive.

Years later, I have my own house and he’s somewhere out in Grand Rapids homeless and addicted to meth.

I made the right choice.
@QueenOfZaun You sure did, wow
Djc58 · 56-60, M
@QueenOfZaun You did make the right choice... though I'm sad for him.

I know stories... from chat mostly, of women that keep falling for men like that... they become the moneybags for constant drama. It's sad that someone keeps doing that.
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
@QueenOfZaun Wow, this is brutal. How some people have it all and some are just unviable. Such is life though.
Djc58 · 56-60, M
She divorced me. After I returned from a deployment. She didn't want to be Army anymore... but her disaffection had started much earlier.

I'm now re-married and very very blessed!
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@Djc58 thank you for your service and I am glad you found a great fit for you
Djc58 · 56-60, M
@robertsnj Yes... thank you.
Djc58 · 56-60, M
Are you divorcing or still divorced?
ErecSchunn · 46-50, M
First marriage was because I got her pregnant when I was 17 and “tried to do the right thing”. Obviously that was a disaster. Second marriage lasted 24 years…. Started out strong, but by the end of it she was married for social status (public figure). After it ended and I talked with my family, I realized she was emotionally abusing me like crazy most of the duration. She did break me down pretty hard core, and two years later I’m finally starting to rebound
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@ErecSchunn man [i]do the right thing [/i]is probalby always the [b]wrong thing[/b]--and the crazy thing is you, and most others in that situation probably are way too young to make a decision as big as marriage. Hats off for you for giving it a shot shot though.

Oh wow public figure. 24 is a long long time.

what does rebound look like for you? (if your comfortable talking about it) I see Dom / Switch on your profile / how does that factor into all of this?
ErecSchunn · 46-50, M
@robertsnj I was 100% vanilla throughout the marriage. I didn’t even know what LS meant and then I met someone who introduced me to it little by little, and over the last couple of years. I’ve kind of figured out what I enjoy.

The rebound for me has been up-and-down. On one hand, I seriously doubt that I will be able to 100% commit to a single person, after the damage I’ve received. On the other hand, I’m not a person who goes out, just has random sex, I like to have a connection with people and an emotional bond of sorts. So finding people that kind of fit that criteria are pretty difficult, it’s kind of a middle ground type thing and pretty much everyone either wants a one night stand or a commitment.
it was amicable. We tried but it wasn't meant to be
Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
My wife had been abused sexually as a child by her brother. We held it together for thirteen years but the psychologists warned us that she might abuse our son. One day she said she needed to find herself and left. That was in. '97. I became a single dad. I have not remarried. I do have close friends. Some have asked me to marry them.
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@Tastyfrzz that is a tough situation. Do you ever look her up / like online or anythinig?
Tastyfrzz · 61-69, M
@robertsnj I just buried her cat this last weekend. We talk but i have no desire to get into a long term relationship with her again. She became psychotic and is on meds.
travelguy01 · 41-45, M
And just what are you going to do with all of this information, hmmmmm?
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@travelguy01 ask follow up questions, compile the data on my sparse responses and send a proposal to google's anaytics team along with pricing and contracting options
Me. Yes. He couldn't view me or treat me as an equal. Or even someone with a say.
robertsnj · 56-60, M
@Activitykittens was he religious? I ask because that is a view that a lot of religous men take / women and men are not equal. How is dating life post divorce?
@robertsnj yes, I can see why you'd think that but no, he wasn't. It's really great. It was terrible. But I have met a wonderful, darling man who treats me as an equal. It's just so delightful to be able to communicate! 😀 Thanks for asking
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robertsnj · 56-60, M
@ImpeccablyImperfect wow that is alot to unpack -*hugs*

Are you two fighting over the house? For someone who lived apart from you for 10 years not sure what what else could be the hold up? did you marry him when you were young?

Yeah i would count the 2 year guy. what happened with him ?
ImpeccablyImperfect · 51-55, F
@robertsnj No, we’re not fighting over the house. It’s mine. He acknowledges this fact. He’s fighting because he does not want to pay me out for the divorce settlement….(he owes me $105k and I have conceded to accept $65k, but he simply doesn’t want to pay ANY) 🤦‍♀️ So the next step is court.
ImpeccablyImperfect · 51-55, F
The other relationship spanned the past 8 years, and it’s a long story concerning his son (my stepson) and MAJOR differences in parenting (causing severe turmoil in our relationship) and I just couldn’t handle it anymore.
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WillaKissing · 56-60
@robertsnj I have never been gay or Bisexual, so I do not see any out of the closet stuff. Being a Heterosexual crossdresser in my eyes does not constitute being or coming out of any closet.

I cross-dressed from 11 to 18 and quit once out of high school and in the Army no I did not cross dress, and when I married it was a latent desire, I did not take part in for the marriage and trying to dedicate myself to it. as well as not interfering with my military career.

So, post-divorce and trying the dating world out, and retired from my career. I quit saying no to my desire to cross dress and no to the women who only sought finances, and what I could provide materially for them 10 plus years ago.

I love intimacy and making love, but when there is no love just a convenience entertainment exercise then it is just sex and I do not want or need the hassles that come with that.

Thank you it cost me $92,000 cash in the divorce to buy her out of my retirement and I put her through nursing college to become an RN BSN working two or three days a week. So, I was not afforded the chance to dodge any bullets with her, just never ever again for me. It made me 42 years old going on 18 financially in 2007.
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WillaKissing · 56-60
@robertsnj Yes. she married a man with a 7 figure a year income.
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robertsnj · 56-60, M
@Lilymoon i think that anyone who gets married before they are 30 is taking a big risk. Not sure when you married however who I was when I was 25 was really different from who I was 10 years later.

You I or anyone just does not 't know themselves well enough to commit to marriage much less someone else finding themselves.
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