Not really a comeback but whenever someone says "I'll be right back" I always respond with "Are you threatening me?" or if someone comments on someone else being short I reply with "Shes not short shes just . . . closer to hell." Got a great response from that yesterday from my manager, made my night lol. She couldn't believe I said that. At work whenever someone is like "I'm leaving" and I respond with either "you promise?" or shout "yay!" and start jumping for joy. They usually rebuttal back with "You jackass."

My great come back for this post you made is please don’t come back 😌🙃🫠

best i can do is gitmo....