Asking
Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

What would you do if your daughter purposely destroyed the car you gave her?

Let's say you are a wealthy person. You give your daughter 4 thousand dollars a month and bought her a new car. She didn't like the color of the car so she stopped caring for it and broke the windows/ destroyed the seats so that you could buy her a new and better car. - what would you do?
First, I'd never spoil a kid like that no matter how wealthy I was.
A kid doesn't get that bad unless they've not been taught boundaries from the age of 18 months. Or something has been seriously wrong, like absentee and workaholic parents.

But let's say it went as you describe.
You don't say how old she is, but let's say she's 17, still at school and old enough to have got her license at a driving school.

First I'd ask her to get the car repaired and customised to her satisfaction using the allowance she'd been given. And her allowance would be cancelled until she'd done that job within whatever money she had left over from the most recent remittance.
Second, I'd give her a much lower allowance - just enough to buy her own clothes (off-the-shelf, no fancy designers) and learn how to work within a budget. She'd have to keep all the receipts and show me her books each month in order to keep receiving the allowance. For anything extra, she'd have to save or get a job.

If she refused to repair the car, I'd cut off all allowance, take her out of her present school and put her at a strict convent boarding school with a 16" foot high stone wall around it, guards and no way out.
(I'm an atheist who would normally never send a kid to a religious school.)

Actually, I had a friend at my school who was expelled. Her parents put her in a convent like the one I described. There was no television, no media, nothing to do except study. When we re-met and became friends again, years later, she said it saved her life. It gave her time to mature a bit without the temptations of rebellion. She passed her HSC with high marks, studied art and ceramics, and went on to become one of the Australia's top ceramic sculptors. She now teaches ceramics at university level.
Like2play · M
No money as well as no car. Get a job
AnonymousJSS · 22-25, F
Lol, I’ve been spoiled too much all my life. Had 3 cars already by age 18 and all of them were bought for me. I’m 23 now and I look back and I feel bad for being so bratty and ungrateful for all the things my parents bought for me.
They always kept buying things for me all the time, I rarely ever said thank you, and I would get bored of new items very fast.

ME, as a future parent would never never spoil my kids to that degree. If they destroyed their car they wouldn’t get a new one until they bought one on their own.
islanderPEI · 56-60, M
I am torn between nothing and a rusty 15 year old Corolla.
islanderPEI · 56-60, M
@islanderPEI Or maybe a 15 year old rust free Corolla from California, with badly faded paint. Then I would offer to buy her a brush or a roller and a can of paint. She picks the colour and she paints the car in the yard, in the sun with flies landing on the wet paint.
I wouldn’t be foolish enough to buy her another car, and the cost of repairing that one would be taken out of her allowance. But, unfortunately people who are used to feeling entitled behave that way and don’t appreciate much. So pushback at any attempts to hold her responsible would be inevitable. 😒
Like2play · M
@bijouxbroussard there would be no allowance coming her way ever again if she was my child. Go apply at McDonald’s and work after school.
BarbossasHusband · 36-40, M
I'd make her drive around in the destroyed one. And if there's anything she HAS TO fix in order to drive it, she's got plenty of allowance to fix it.
Neoerectus · M
Tell to earn money for a bike or walk. AND pay me back. Cut allowance. Consider disinheriting her.
TeirdalinBot · 31-35, M
It would be important to assess the situation and understand the underlying reasons for the daughter's behavior. If there are deeper issues at play, such as mental health or emotional issues, it may be necessary to seek professional help. It may also be important to set clear boundaries and consequences for destructive behavior. Ultimately, the decision would be up to the parent and their individual values and priorities.
DunningKruger · 61-69, M
What could you do at this point? You've ruined her already — she's an adult now and behaves like a toddler, so you really didn't do your job as a parent. Either just get her the car she wants, or cut her off entirely. There is no middle ground.
Justforfun65 · 56-60, M
She would be catching rides with her friends
DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F
She'd not get one red cent out of me again.
Starcrossed · 41-45, F
Cut her off.
uncalled4 · 56-60, M
In a word? Rollerblades.
lumberjackslam · 41-45, M
why give her $4000/month? clearly she was spoiled and taking advantage of you in the first place.

 
Post Comment