Mum & Daughter Struggles

Me and my mum are constantly speaking different languages.. We can never have a proper conversation without one of us getting worked up and arguing. It’s like she doesn’t respect that I have an opinion all because of the fact that she considers herself an open minded thinker. She disregards anything I have to say and gaslights me by saying “no, you can’t answer back to me.” or “show some respect and don’t talk back”. ITS SO INFURIATING BECAUSE SHES THE ONE WHO GETS ME WORKED UP IN THE FIRST PLACE AND THEN AS SOON AS I FINALLY BITE BACK AND STAND UP FOR MYSELF SHE THEN PROCEEDS TO TRY AND MAKE ME SHUT UP. It’s so mentally draining and it makes my skin crawl because I feel like I can never say how I feel because I get told to shut up. Smh. I don’t know what else to do?

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TinyViolins · 31-35, M Best Comment

My mom was the exact same way. She just could not handle any difference of opinion. And it's not like she had good or valid reasons for believing what she did. Her defense consisted entirely of gaslighting and manipulation. Saying that we either don't know what we're talking about or that she never said or did something that she absolutely said or did.

Eventually I stopped talking to her because she would never listen. It was even worse than talking to a wall. It's been about 15 years since I've really seen her, and I don't regret cutting her out of my life in the slightest. People like that are toxic and won't ever respect you unless you do what they want you to do.

I'm not suggesting that you do the same, but letting you know that it would be completely understandable if you did.

ninjavu · 51-55, M

Sounds familiar.

"... she considers herself an open minded thinker." Some of the most open-minded people I have known are actually the most closed-minded, but they think that because they're open-minded on a particular topic, they're god's gift to open-mindedness. I've encountered this mostly in the swinger lifestyle.

"'no, you can’t answer back to me.' or 'show some respect and don’t talk back'". Sounds like my father. Because he blew his load in my mother, that automatically means that I am to respect him for all eternity. 🤷‍♂️

I'm sorry you're having this problem, but you're not alone. 🤗

TheotherAndy · 41-45, M

I’ve been in similar shoes

SW-User

She brought you into this world.

grapeluvsira · 22-25

@SW-User and that entitles her to respect? i didn’t ask to be transported from my fathers balls into her vagina and conceived into a fetus.

SW-User

@grapeluvsira you need to be loved

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lacrossegirl25 · 22-25, F

@grapeluvsira i can mix the two up

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