Will I always be defined by the bad things I’ve done/mistakes I’ve made?

I’m not the person I was a few years ago, but people still remind me of what I was like and the things I did. I hope that one day soon they can forget about it all.

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OlderSometimesWiser · F

While they may never completely forget, the longer you build a positive track record, the more those memories of the old you will fade.

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Thankyou, I know you’re right, I think I’m just having ‘a moment’ as I saw some people from school who wanted to remind me of how I was. Some of it I suppose I deserve and some of it was a bit cruel on their part. @OlderSometimesWiser

OlderSometimesWiser · F

@Strongtea And I have confidence that the more mature you will learn how to handle those situations and reinforce the fact that you’ve changed.

DarkSideoftheMoon · 36-40, F

If you still do those things and still make those mistakes than yeah but if you have growin into a better person than no because we live and we learn. Sometimes mistakes are life lessons we learn from

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Strongtea · 22-25, M

Thanks again, I think about it a lot, but what you have said there means a lot!@DarkSideoftheMoon

DarkSideoftheMoon · 36-40, F

@Strongtea no worries. I hope you forgive yourself because i think you deserve it

Strongtea · 22-25, M

😊😊😊@DarkSideoftheMoon

Umile · 41-45, F

The consequences of our actions.

Try to understand that the amount of hurt that you caused is going to match the the amount of resentment that you're receiving.

Empathy.

Although I do believe in second chances.

I think you need to be persistent with it. Show that you are adamant in the changing of your ways and that you are sorry for them.

Communication.

You need to talk about it.

Some clarity and closure.

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Thankyou! Some great points there. I have not been very good at apologising or talking about the things that I did, preferring to pretend that they didn’t happen. It’s difficult because I’m so embarrassed, but I need to face up to it. Being on here has helped as it feels much easier to talk about it all and most people have been very nice (and the ones that weren’t, well I probably deserved what they said to me.) @Umile

Umile · 41-45, F

@Strongtea It doesn't cost a cent to be nice.

🙏

Strongtea · 22-25, M

I know that now, I don’t think I did when I was younger. 🥺@Umile

Cassieeee · 31-35, F

Maybe it's time to leave them in the past with the memories they have of you..

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Yes, I suppose you’re right, we’re not really friends, they’re just people from school so we don’t have much in common anymore. We live in quite a small town though so we do see each other from time to time. But yes, I think I need to move on. @Cassieeee

Cassieeee · 31-35, F

@Strongtea You can still say hi and be polite when you see them, but no need to stay friends with people that's stuck in the past. Specially when you're trying to move forward.