As my husband and I were fawning all over Mia because it’s her 3rd birthday my MIL says

“If you’re like this with Mia Imagine if you had had a little girl! you’d both be besides yourselves!”

She immediately killed a moment of joy for me.

Daniels 5th heavenly birthday was just 2 weeks ago, and we got Mia 6 months postpartum from my losing my boy/girl twins 3 years ago (we got her in June) but today is her birthday.

I was so angry but I had no words. I walked away. It’s the best thing I could do.

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BlueMetalChick · 26-30, F

I guess it's just one of those things. I joke about my dead child a lot because honestly if I didn't make fun of it, I'd probably go insane.

KaysHealingPath · 36-40, F

@BlueMetalChick that’s how you cope, I can’t tell you what’s right or wrong. With how YOU cope with YOUR loss.
It’s not her place to say shit about me and having more or not having more kids.
We tried. There’s nothing I wanted more. But it didn’t work out.

BlueMetalChick · 26-30, F

@KaysHealingPath Well, yeah. That's why I said I guess it's just one of those things, y'know, like it's something that there really is no way to tell someone how to be. Trauma like that doesn't have a "right" or "wrong." You just kinda do whatever it is you hafta do. Other people might not get it, but it's the respectful thing to do to at least try, which she apparently didn't do for you.