@bijouxbroussard personally growing up what I've seen is that my grandmother and even my mum have pushed for such perfection that there are family members that are a complete mess riddled with anxiety including me because we can never live up to their high expectations.
When they themselves seem to be dealing with something major.
My grandmother appears to have adhd and quite possibly ocd and incredibly controlling.
My mum is a hoarder, deals with depression and anxiety is incredibly disorganised and often impulsive (putting her foot in her mouth)
But they hold themselves to such high standards they are highly critical of everything and everyone and often very sad as a consequence.

@Mellowgirl I grew up with ADHD and it's no fun, I had an older stepbrother who never understood what I was going through and made my life hell.

@Wol62 at least you were diagnosed my mum refuses to get tested and also refuses to get counselling. She thinks she's smarter than any doctor. And personally wouldn't want a diagnoses as that would make her tainted!

@SW-User 100% agree

@masterofyou I think of it like this they know no different so they live based upon what happens to them. If we feel sympathy and molly coddle them they don't get to live a full or fulfilling life.
You never allow anyone under those circumstances to reach their potential u der those circumstances.
There are hundreds if not thousands of people undiagnosed does that prevent them from living their lives?
No... If anything having the diagnosis is a benefit as it helps the person and others to understand how to deal with potentially tricky situations.

@CrazyMusicLover Well I don't know her very well and if I'm honest my grandmother and my mum don't know them as a family very well.
So for them to make such a statement felt uncaring and incredibly judgmental.
It really angered me because she is our family.
If this is how we judge them imagine how others treat them.

It really hurt to hear such a thing!
And the main reason they said it is not because she displays differences but simply because they'd be embarrassed to have to walk with her with her earphones on her head.

They're that shallow.

People often ask me why I have such a difficult relationship with my mum and this is one of the many reasons. She's hypercritical of others.

But expects an abundance of compassion when she doesn't quite get something right!

@Mellowgirl I understand you and it's hard for me to understand their reaction.

@FloorGenAdm okay... Where they good? Bad?

@Mellowgirl They're okay I guess. Strikes me as odd there are so many lately...is this autism month?

@FloorGenAdm I think it's April here in the uk but as for the ads I think the lockdown has had an effect to social care/isolation etc

@badminton I have no idea. I personally don't know that much about the condition. But my experience with my second cousin was as I stated in the post here.
I see her infrequently and personally I'd love to see her more but for what ever reason that hasn't happened.
I know that she has differences but they appear to be so minor I couldn't quite possibly say its a shame she's that way at all.
It really hurt me tbh.

@Poeticdiva no idea... Its a question, based upon the information provided to you!