Would you still put yourself out there if...

1. You had chronic PTSD that hindered you doing several social activities?
2. You don't have too much dating experience at 44?
3. You don't feel worthy of someone's time, due to your chronic issue?

(Yes I've worked on these issues for years now, have not made much progress , my past trauma severe, and my therapists who just nod 😢)

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Muthafukajones · 46-50, M

Get out there already!

MyMonstersAreReal · F

I probably wouldn’t. Im kinda on my last try right now I don’t think I’d be all interested in doing it again in ten years so but I’m not strong like you are. I think it’s so amazing you even would consider it and it shows how brave you are 🫂

Baybreeze · 41-45, F

@MyMonstersAreReal Well if I don't try to push past my fears of panic, that I'm not enough, then it feels very hopeless to ever get out there. I remember a few people told me back at EP, you don't have to be healed and whole to date, otherwise no one would date lol. And the person could help you heal .... So I'm going to try to keep that in my head and love toolbox. Trust me I don't feel brave at all. But I'm hoping soon I will be🦋

Baybreeze · 41-45, F

@MyMonstersAreReal And side note, you are brave inside friend 🌸

eyeno · M

hugs…

Baybreeze · 41-45, F

@eyeno Ty friend 🫂

eyeno · M

@Baybreeze

Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

I'm not sure about the first one ,but I do have social anxiety ,and I do feel the third one sometimes.
I think for myself I got to stop hoping people will accept me as I am and start observing and noting who does and who doesn't and distant myself from those who don't.
I don't believe in cutting every single person out of my life ,but you can put the brakes on some relationships and pull it back.

SirNedKelly · M

@Justmeraeagain we still respect and care about you, even if you are American 😁♥

Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

@SirNedKelly I feel the same about the Australians,lol 😄

Selah ·

No tbh. There are too many obstacles and too much disappointment also I don't think vulnerable women should be dating but I think it's good to be open minded but not stretch too far out of your comfort zone. I know a lot of women who found love under worse circumstances.

Baybreeze · 41-45, F

@Selah Well the obstacles are mainly men who would do what I fear..ditch me because of this disorder. Which is fair in some instances, but someone said once do you want someone who would just ditch you because of anxiety? I'll never date though if I don't accept some of this about myself , and not feel shame about it.

Dayman · 31-35, M

I’d find a new therapist they’re not all made the same and go at your own pace it’s not a race

Sapio · 51-55, M

Some exposure out of your comfort zone isn't a bad thing. Just start in small increments.

Baybreeze · 41-45, F

@Sapio I appreciate that 🪻

OutoftheGloom · 46-50, F

Yes I'd push myself until what I wanted was more easy for me. Every time you tell yourself that you have PTSD, you reinforce in your mind that there's an issue so it's a self fulfilling prophecy. You can feed yourself affirmations about all the things you can successfully do and stop reinforcing that you will have struggles.

The other thing I noticed is that you said
You don't feel worthy of someone's time due to "your chronic issues" see right there you took ownership of it?

Mental illness is an illness. Like flu. Nobody ever says "your flu" they would say they have "the flu" so I think you need to stop taking that ownership and refuse to accept it as a part of you.

That's when you'll start to move forward. a
Also, think about when you date and spend time with another person. You're giving them some company and friendship, even if it doesn't work out romantically and it's only for a few weeks, it lightens life and you get to have a bit of fun for a while. I think that worth anyone's time.

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

Step a hair out of your comfort zone. Your narc abuse distorted reality. Guys want to meet a good woman.

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