@buriedalive Well its good you went on the dates...I am so nervous for that even. I think I do overestimate all a guy wants as well..half are mainly seeking sex. And not a true bond.
No, it's because I have to fix my life first. I don't think I'm in a position where putting effort into searching for a partner would be wise right now.
@SW-User Thank you and yeah at one point I had all sorts of colors going on. I had green, various purple shades, silver etc my hair needed a break plus I needed to sort of start fresh and new to distance myself from some not so great things.
But I get too panicked to even GO on the date, I feel no one would ever love someone with as many anxieties as I have. 
