Tips for overcoming trust issues in a relationship & Exploring the challenges and rewards of long-distance relationships

In my experience, there have been numerous instances of fights and disagreements, particularly related to issues of disloyalty. It's disheartening to constantly come across online narratives that portray long-distance relationships as inherently fragile and likely to fail. However, I wonder if there is more we can do to influence the outcome, or if it's solely a matter of fate.

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PoeticPlay · 51-55, M

Be the example of what you wish to come true.

MaybelChong · 46-50, F

@PoeticPlay This is a wonderful statement, and has lifted me up in many moments. But, I would argue it will not work all the time. Accepting something undesirable is often disappointing and will not be sustainable decision especially disloyalty. What do you think?

PoeticPlay · 51-55, M

@MaybelChong
I no longer have expectations of people.

But I do have requirements. 🧐

Queendragonfly · 31-35, F

In my experience it takes two very grounded people for a LDR to not be consumed by distrust jealousy or control.

Also if someone has confused infatuation with love and think they're inlove when they're actually just infatuated, will also cause problems.

Or someone who only dates someone to not feel lonely.

MaybelChong · 46-50, F

@Queendragonfly This is the best perspective someone has offered me today. It's true that feelings can be developed with a different individual and that will most likely be infatuation. When this is considered I find confidence in LDR.

exexec · 61-69, C

My wife and I started dating at 15 and dated nobody else until both of us went off to college at different universities. I had no choice but to allow her to date others and enjoy the college experience. I was really jealous to know that she was seeing other guys every day and I only saw her once or twice a month during the school year. This went on for 2 12 years until we decided to return to an exclusive dating relationship. This was long before cell phones or the Internet, so we wrote letters to each other every day, professing our love for each other, and talked on the phone twice a week. She convinced me that she loved only me, and I believed her. I didn't ask for details of her dates until after we married, and I am glad that I didn't.

MaybelChong · 46-50, F

@exexec I can see that allowing her to date others would have been hard for you. Didnt you date anyone else? why you say you had no other chance but to let her date someone else?

exexec · 61-69, C

@MaybelChong I didn't the time, desire, or money to date anyone else. Her parents required that she date others in college.

RedBaron · M

In a nutshell, geographically undesirable.

MaybelChong · 46-50, F

@RedBaron why do some fail and others dont?

RedBaron · M

I have no idea

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