So I'm at the club last night with my sister

And this one guy comes up to me and goes "can I buy you a drink?" So I look at him and say "sorry, I don't drink i take antipsychotics" trying to scare him away lmao

And this guy looks at me for a minute and goes "I love you" 💀

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PatKirby · M Best Comment

Haha, like that one. Might use that. A 4-5 schmoozed next to me at the bar near closing time and charmly asked if I'd like to buy her a drink. Thought of using the ole 'I have a gf' line to brush her off but instead told her 'I have HIV'. Whoosh, works every time.😂

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

What if she was a 5.5? @PatKirby

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson

Uhhh, guess I'd use the alternative line 'I have herpes' 🤣 The gift that keeps on giving.

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

6.5? And you’re buzzed. @PatKirby

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson

Ok then, because 7 is my threshold metric, I'd have to say 'I think I'm coming down with covid, six feet please.'

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

What’s your description of a 7? @PatKirby

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson

For a 6.9....I'm Gay.

PatKirby · M

For a 7+...I pay them...to leave my house 🏡 when done!

The higher they are...the more i pay them to leave my property. With a smile of course😊

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

Surely a gentleman such as yourself doesn’t pay lol. @PatKirby

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson

A legitimate concern. All sarcasm aside, it costs significantly less in the long run over a wide variety of things these daze. The moment you say 'I do' at the altar, she says 'I don't' in the bedroom. The answer is straightforward, rent never buy.

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

Crazily the longer we’ve been married the more sex my wife wants. Baffling. AND she prefers TJ Maxx. @PatKirby

DeluxedEdition · 26-30, F

@PatKirby I laughed so hard 🤣 lmfaoooooo!!!!! you are wrong for that one !!!

jackjjackson · 61-69, M

I’m thinking that our pal PK is having some fun with us. @DeluxedEdition

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson @DeluxedEdition

^Bingo^ Guys you gotta keep it lite, heheh 🤣

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jackjjackson · 61-69, M

You’re too classy for paying as you go to be your only female contact 🤙🏼 @PatKirby

PatKirby · M

@jackjjackson

Thank you. Curiously if I resort to drinking Bud Lite at the bar, no one bothers me. Works almost every time, except for trans BBQ+. Ever used a snappy line yourself? Or you just point to your ring?