I am too fat, but I can’t stop eating. I’ve struggled with my mental health and weight as long as I can remember. But the urge to hurt myself went away every time I ate. So I kept eating. And now, I don’t want to do anything rash or hurt myself, but food is my life now. I can’t seem to stop eating and gaining weight. I know I’m too fat and it’s only getting worse. I can’t fit a seatbelt around myself in some cars. I struggle to get up from furniture that is too low to the ground. I wear leggings and sweaters because the stretch with me and aren’t constructing like jeans. I can feel a waddle developing as I walk. I’m winded going up 15 stairs. I’m soon to be 23 and I weigh 427 pounds. I get embarrassed and frustrated when I try to exercise so I quit. And eating is the only thing that makes me feel better, so the cycle continues and I gain more even more weight. I’m proud that suicide and death no longer lingers at the edge of every thought I have. But now putting each bite of food in my mouth is my every thought. I’m too fat and I know what the solution is but there’s something that stops me from actually doing it and it’s frustrating as hell because I have no excuse for being the size I am and I should be able to fix it and I should have never let it get this far but here I am. Inching closer to 500, 600, 700 pounds and death and I’m not stopping.
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SW-User
That's depressing...You need to smack yourself and tell yourself that this is not how you're going to spend the rest of your life. There's still time to turn this around.
