I Am A Biromantic Asexual

I’ve never experienced sexual attraction to anyone or anything. I’ve never been interested in or wanting for sex. I’ve accepted the fact that I’m asexual, although I haven’t officially announced it to anyone except a few friends, and they all say it’s because I haven’t met the right person yet.

But I have experienced romantic feelings for a few people in my life, male and female. I do want a romantic relationship with someone, but without the sex and similar intimacy.

There’s one person I’ve had these feelings for for a little over a year. We’ve been best friends for 13 years. What I feel for her is stronger than anyone else I’ve ever had these feelings for. But I know she wants and enjoys sex (I’ve even considered having an open-like relationship. They can sleep with whoever they want, but they have to be safe, it can’t come in our home, and they have to come home to me). But she has a boyfriend right now that she desperately loves. So I watch from afar yet so close because we are still best friends. I even changed her name in my phone because seeing the names we have each other hurts me. I don’t know what to do. I wish her all the happiness and I would never try to sabotage her relationship, but I do find myself wanting it to end. Which makes me feel awful.