Addiction of Any Kind

My brother, who lives with me, is an alcoholic. It is the most horrible of all things to go through as a caring sibling. When our mother died, I inherited my brother. I was the only one in the family that had children so it was an easy fix...Akindheart gets the kid. I raised him as my own.

He started drinking at 14 that I know of. He has been sober for long periods of time but then binge drinks when something stresses him out.

No one will help me. The family is done with him and I have to watch this on a daily basis. yes, I can kick him out, Yes, I can let him die and Yes, I know that he has to want treatment. Even my friends avoid me rather than discuss it.

It is the worst thing you can inflict on a family member. The absolutely worst. I have tried everything to help him. right now, he is doing good but who knows what will set him off again.

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DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

Having to take care of an alcoholic mother until she passed away, would be similar. No one else would do it as well.

My best advice is patience is precious. It broke my heart when my older siblings forced her into a nursing home for the last two remaining weeks.

They killed her in my opinion. She would have lived longer under my care, if not months longer. It's what even she begged of me.

All my siblings wouldn't allow it though.

Ironically my oldest sister passed away shortly later. She was the one that objected the most.

The non alcoholic sibling didn't live as long as her alcohol mother.

Those last few years were precious to me. I got to know our mother far better than all the rest. She even told me things she told no one else.

She survived all of WWII in Europe.

akindheart · 61-69, F

@DeWayfarer that is a story.. .blessings on your end and the end for your sister. how very sad. addiction changes the dynamics of any family. it is sad. and sometimes they get past the point of no return. why wouldn't your family allow you to keep your mother?

DeWayfarer · 61-69, M

@akindheart optics and religion. You see mom required monitoring at all times. Including bathing and medical aid. I had to help her with both. Couple of times carry her.

I may look weak and skinny but I'm not. Not saying it was easy, yet even strong people have a hard time carrying nearly 300 lbs.

My eldest sister had other issues with me as it was. Yet those two things blew her top.

I grew up far differently than she did and she had kids around my age. One actually two years older than me.

What was frustrating to me is the nursing home they put her in didn't even give her sponge baths in that two weeks. They put her on a catheter. And I doubt she ever got up.

I never would have just let her give up like that. I had her on a daily routine. Not just laying in bed.

They just didn't like the optics of the whole situation.

Please note I did the same with my own father. I wasn't without experience. It just wasn't their father.

Kstrong · 56-60, F

@akindheart my brother was an addict , alcohol and drugs, succumbed to peer pressure when he was 13, developing into drug and alcohol addiction.... At several points in his life, he got clean, I don't know what's pulled him back into the cycle... Prison... Rehab... Prison... The cycle doesn't end.... Don't know if he's dead or alive... Just wonder what he would have been like if he never took that first sip or that first smoke.... I'll never know ...

akindheart · 61-69, F

@DeWayfarer you have my respect, admiration and sympathy. alcholism is horrible in itself but to have a non supportive family, it makes it even worse.

akindheart · 61-69, F

@Kstrong that is so sad. i have no addictions but my entire family has something going on. my brother and ih ave different dads. his side of that family has lost several members to addiction. my brother was born during the height of my mother's addiction so he didn't stand a chance.

antonioioio · 70-79, M

@Kstrong @akindheart I will also say , ye are both very brave to tell us about yer brothers ♥️