Some days to wake up is like pulling myself out of concrete with a heart like a stone I claw for consciousness on the knife's edge of wakefulness.
Today The sun hurts my eyes again It would seem to me that my mind has wandered somewhere that It should not have gone in the night, that The night life behind my eyelids Might have been too much too handle
Needless to say Today I am vulnerable Needless to say Today's the kinda day
I'll hide behind my sunglasses Underneath my favorite hat Between my Headphones Inside my jacket
Yes, I'll stow away my heavy heart bury it in the music that sings of God Because I would rather think of Him Than let my heart wonder and fill in the blank lines of what happened behind my eyelids last night I don't wanna know what happened I don't wanna remember what I saw Spare my heart, Lord, of the terror of the night.
Let me hide away for today
Sitting here at Central Park Station Watching from behind tinted sunglasses My heart twisting, turning, wondering if the other pairs of sunglasses are hiding the pain inside others' brains?
Surely I'm not alone, no I can't be the only one like this, right? I can't be the only one freezing, suffocating underneath this blanket of Depression...
I can't be the only one whose mind whispers as the train rolls into the station "Throw yourself down in front of it Maybe then death will lift you up again"...
I've always heard there are only two kinds of people who wear sunglasses indoors Those who are blind, and those who think highly of themselves
But I'm not blind, and I'm not that kinda guy who wants your attention No, These are so you cannot See me for me, because I hurt deeply Leave me alone, please
Oh, but you, God, I cannot hide from you I will not try to hide from you Because I know there's no shadow you won't light up No mountain you won't climb up To find me, to be with me
I know there is no wall you won't kick down No lie you won't tear down Coming after me
Lord, I find myself hiding my mind away today Far away from those around my brain I have dressed as a mere shadow Hiding in the crevasses of this vast mountain again
Come find me, be with me, walk with me, speak to me
This jacket is my prison, I'm stuck behind these dark lenses, pinned beneath this hat, caught between these headphones I'm safe in here but I don't wanna be in here As a ship in harbor is safe, but is not meant to stay there
I'm safely hidden away in the folds of melody and harmony The walls that no man can climb have come up It's just you and me on this white blank page Nobody else can see through this fortress, Jesus Only you, Only you can see, only you can gain entry
The lies of the night are in my mind, God The sludge of this heart is hard to pull myself through I don't want anyone else in here but you Nobody else needs to see me this way
Only you know that I am this way When I Hide away For you alone are my refuge, my God You alone are my refuge and strength.
