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I Want To Confess

Yes I've hurt my lover a lot and that's the only reason she left me.i been telling lies to others that she left me cuz she never loved me. But the truth is she loved me more than anyone else has ever done, but I always hurt her. Whatever story you say to others doesn't heal you because deep down the truth is inside you and you know it very well.
Yes I'm a bad person and too coward to suicide.
People like me should not exist in this world cuz they don't deserve love.
I just wish if i ever get her back so I'll give her all the happiness and take all pain from her life but it's too late and this is only a dream now.
I just wanna say don't ever hurt someone that loves you because nowadays it's really hard to find someone like that .

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eftelingrose · 26-30, F

Please know that even if you did truly hurt someone who you loved, that, yes, you deserve life, just like everyone else. Your life is a gift, Danny. I have been hurt by a guy who truly hurt me, and who I truly loved; now that I think that he hates me. However, I still need to stay strong for myself, love myself and remind myself of the family and friends who love and care about me; who to really live for. It must be very difficult, I can imagine, to live through this. Please know that you are never alone; you never know what the future holds, as well!
As long as you keep pushing, loving yourself, and seeking happiness and positivity in your life, the biggest pain will be temporary.
God bless you, and I truly wish you all the best in your journey! :)

Danny54268 · 26-30, M

@eftelingrose sorry to hear what happened to you and also good to hear the way you moved on.
But here I'm the who hurt her that's why it's damn hard to forget things.

eftelingrose · 26-30, F

@Danny54268 Thank you very much for your kind words. Of course I understand that your circumstances are different. I hope that you don’t feel all this pain after a while. :)

trackman11 · 61-69, M

My friend, if you aren’t already, please consider counseling. You lie to others because you are ashamed of the truth and you hurt someone who loved you because you have anger and hurt that you’ve never resolved. You are a special young man with gifts, abilities and undiscovered potential, but you are a prisoner to your view of self. Seek help, solve that and then when suicidal thoughts, self doubt and anger are under control, only then seek a relationship. A young woman may see you as an attractive “fixer upper” but that will lead you to this same place. If I’m completely off base and have assumed incorrectly just ignore this. I believe you can overcome this young man.

Danny54268 · 26-30, M

@trackman11 sir I know this but now things keep reminding me the way I used to hurt her by my words.i can't forget it and don't know what to do to forget it.

trackman11 · 61-69, M

@Danny54268 Danny, I hear you. Some people use hurtful words because they are selfish. They don’t suffer like you are with guilt and regret. However, the fact you feel so badly is an indication you have a good heart.
I don’t need to know, but ask yourself if you are sorry that you lost her or sorry that you hurt her. Depending on which emotion is stronger indicates what you need to work on. If it’s the loss, you will simply have to grieve that loss and learn from mistakes. If it’s truly that you hurt someone you would be wise to get at the core of “why” you did it.
As for “forgetting “, stop trying. Life is full of mistakes and regrets and remeothem has value even though it hurts. Work on moving forward by dealing with issues you need to deal with and don’t settle for bandage relationships or even words.
I am sorry you feel this way. I know it’s difficult.

FreeOrchid · 36-40, F

This is everything I wish my ex could say to give me closure. He just lies and blames me for him abusing me.

At least you can say it. Many continue their lies.

Danny54268 · 26-30, M

@FreeOrchid really sorry to hear that ma'am but maybe he's also ashamed and can't say it to you?

FreeOrchid · 36-40, F

@Danny54268 my story is extreme...he isn’t sorry...he feels no guilt

Holdontothefire · 26-30, M

Thankfully you're not the one who gets to decide what you deserve. Hope isn't lost, not for you. You have more power than you think you do. You have the ability to be better than you believe you can right now. The future is out there and you can do whatever you want with it. You can choose to change things, believe in yourself, and prove to yourself that you deserve to succeed.

We all make mistakes. We all hurt someone at some point. Sometimes it is a challenge to deal with the decisions we make, but it is far from impossible. Even if you don't believe that right now.

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