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I Enjoy Solitude

Sometimes I yearn for solitude. It's so far been easy to find because it's just me and my husband, and our friends all seem to know how to be companionably silent. However, I have a sister who, following a big seizure, has been diagnosed with a brain tumour. She will not be able to live on her own, so she will have to live with us. Despite being quite deaf she refuses to get a hearing aid, on top of which she's a demanding, attention-seeking person. She has no hobbies or interests and cannot immerse herself in a book. Being sensitive to hints, backing off, etc, are not her strong points either, which is a shame because we have a particular lifestyle which I have no intention of spelling out to her. Our house is quite a big one, but only the study is truly off limits. When she visits she follows me around. All in all she isn't easy to be with.

Although I intend to give her a safe space, and know I couldn't live with myself if I didn't do it, I truly dread having my world turned up side down.

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Justbychance · M

I'm trying to read some amount of empathy within what you write, but I don't see it; in essence, I don't know if that is how you feel or how you intended to write what you did.

My thoughts are, that in life there are times when it's good to be on ones own and in ones own company. In silence we are not in a stagnant place because silence itself wraps around our inner, deeper thoughts. And yet life surely has to be a mixture of what we can control whilst walking alongside what we cannot control. It's a change ... something which most of us find ourselves having to face.

I sympathise in what you do say, whilst thinking that something has changed within your surrounds which must surely not mean that you are funnelled into a life of 'change'. It's a bit like saying that a loved one is outside your ideals which means there has to be changes, and yet within those changes there must surely be a way for you to adapt to those changes. Taking into consideration there are many people who's lives are changed by circumstances out of their control, then we each need to find ways to adapt and (just maybe) find another niche within such changes but either way, it comes down to considering that we all face changes and challenges in our lives which we have to address