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I Am Not Well

I am not well. A switch flips in my head and I become a monster. I literally watch myself say these things and do these things that are not me. For months. And then one day the switch flips back and I'm awake again to sit in this mess I've made of everything and everyone around me. I destroyed someone. I didn't want to. I didn't mean to. I told her to leave. I told her I couldn't be what she needed. But she stayed. And the switch flipped. And now she is a different person. And I hate myself for it.

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WildHeart · 41-45, F

Then maybe you need to disarm the switch altogether.

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WildHeart · 41-45, F

@Rebel1down: Then go talk to her and maybe she can help you with this situation you keep finding yourself in. If that's not an option then let her be, in time she will be okay.

Rebel1down · 36-40, M

@WiseGirl: I am trying to let her be. She keeps trying to get close. All I can do is continue to not show affection. We have a child together so complete avoidance is impossible.

WildHeart · 41-45, F

@Rebel1down: Okay! Now that changes the whole situation.

sunsetsoareomyofavourite · 26-30, F

Why do you change? And what makes you change? Emotions?
That happened with me in a way because of emotions. Please explain more

Rebel1down · 36-40, M

@Unicorn: I don't know. I probably need a doctor.

sunsetsoareomyofavourite · 26-30, F

@Rebel1down: yes. If you need someone to talk then write me

Rebel1down · 36-40, M

@Unicorn: Why?

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