I'm Hurting

I threw away the one good thing in my life.
The last few months have been so hard physically and mentally but I had a purpose, a reason to be.
Now I don't have that and everything seems so pointless.
Was it the right decision? I will never know.
I served one who was fair and just, yet I still laughed every day.
Now everything just seems pointless and I see no reason to continue.