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I Lost Someone Important to Me

I hate all the soft terms for it. My grandad didn't 'pass away', I didn't 'lose' him; he died. Pure and simple. That was on Wednesday, 5th July 2017. Two days ago. And although I was there when it happened, and I was sobbing so much, I felt so much grief when they took off the machines and I saw him flatline, now I feel nothing. Except it isn't nothing, it isn't the numbness that a lot of people feel. It's literally that I just don't feel sad. I feel all other emotions, I'm completely normal. I just don't miss him, and I'll be laughing with friends at school and forget he ever existed. I'm not sure why that is, and I so desperately want to miss him, I don't know why I don't. It's actually scaring me a bit how little I seem to care even though he meant everything to me when he was alive.

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silkandlace · 46-50, M

It's ok, you can't take it all in at once

loveyourselfalways00 · 22-25, F

@silkandlace: But I felt it all yesterday. So if that was, if that's all the grieving time my body is allowing me then I really hate it.

silkandlace · 46-50, M

@loveyourselfalways00: take it as it comes; yesterday surely isn't the "grieving time" your body needs; it's a shock, even if you watched him flatline; relax and prepare for it,

SW-User

@loveyourselfalways00: my ex father in law died in the hospital 7 yrs ago,my at the time 7 yrs waS really close to him, it took her one year to accept he was gone. Today's she's 14 and has a pic of them, him and her as screen saver in her cell. He was a big part of her life

loveyourselfalways00 · 22-25, F

@silkandlace: Thank you, I really do feel as though I need to let something out but it just won't come.
@KindChanny: That really sucks, I hope you both got through it okay, it's wonderful that she was so close even at that age though you know?