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Happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy. No person will make you happy unless you decide to be happy. Your happiness will not come to you. It can only come from you

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Gusman · 61-69, M

I agree with you. So many times I have told people who suffer depression that if they were to have an attitudinal change then there would be a marked improvement in their outlook. Of course I get shot down most times. With comments like, "How would you know how I feel?" "So, if I just change my mind, all will be well?"
I was in that dark place for many years, having been abused by family members, alcoholism to block it out. So I know what it is to be unhappy, depressed. One day I decided to make an effort to see the good in the world, to make myself laugh. Or to put it better, To allow myself to laugh.
Doing nothing, nothing will change, making an effort at least gives happiness a chance

MissMollyCharlotte0702

Of course it’s important to do the above. I have too, but it comes on so suddenly. I have ptsd and triggers will get the best of me. Today is one of those days. @Gusman

Gusman · 61-69, M

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 You have coping strategies to deal with the triggers? Or avoid those triggers as much as possible

MissMollyCharlotte0702

@Gusman have started therapy. Today I think not living would be nice actually, but suicide is not an option. I’d never leave my son.

Gusman · 61-69, M

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 Not living would be bliss instead of what one goes through in this at times horrible world. If you give your recovery 100% commitment, tell yourself that you really want to change, believe in yourself, you deserve to be happy. Change will come. Might take a while. Allow yourself to laugh.
Do your best to avoid triggers. Good luck.

MissMollyCharlotte0702

If I avoid triggers then I have to avoid people all together. Others are my problem. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt attacked, criticised, or blamed. I can’t handle much these days. @Gusman

TexChik · F

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 I’m always here if I can help ... I know exactly how all that feels . You’re not alone . 🙂

Gusman · 61-69, M

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 I was in the same boat. It was being around other people that pissed me off big time. So I had as little contact with them as possible. I went to work, done what was necessary, tolerated people but every weekend would get away from society. Out in the countryside.
Life is hard. It is how we handle the stress that has either a positive or negative effect on us.
I am sympathetic to your plight. I may come across as a bit hard.That is not my intent.
I am pointing out that circumstances can improve when we make a positive effort.

MissMollyCharlotte0702

My mind is clouded tonight. At times there is no energy. I sleep a lot and at times don’t function well. Funny thing is I work with people with disabilities and I am able to go in do my job, be as helpful as possible then as soon as I get into the car my personality changes and I shut off. Its hard to explain.i can’t stop crying this evening
Seriously.@Gusman

Gusman · 61-69, M

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 Just go with it. Trying to stop will be detrimental. One thing I done when I was in that really down state of mind was pick up a pen and write. I did not think about what to write, I simply wrote every word that came into my head. I wrote until my mind was empty. I did not read what I had written because that would have put it back in my head. I tore it up and threw it in the bin. Gave me a few days without fighting with my mind. Very peaceful

MissMollyCharlotte0702

I’m working on a type of therapy where memories are stored in long term memories.Its exhausting.
Another is through a church where they work through issues and bring God into the equation. My friend did it with me and I had so much peace from it, but I think it was too much for her. It involved God and prayer and before that night I had dreams for years of he girls who bullied me in high school and he dreams were bad, but lately the dreams involve me and these girls getting along in my dreams. I was also molested so those dreams stopped as well.@Gusman

Gusman · 61-69, M

@MissMollyCharlotte0702 Then your making progress so would be wise to keep doing what you have been doing, When you are at your lowest, try writing, see what happens. If it's midnight and your thoughts are keeping you awake. Pick up a pen and see what happens. Try not to fight it. Important to throw it away, in my opinion. Do not want to put those thoughts back into your head.

MissMollyCharlotte0702

I have done that and it didn’t work for me. @Gusman