I Feel Broken Inside

I wrote that last night but I've been hurting inside all day. Some of it is over exaggerated because of the lines that came to my mind. Thank you for reading and the comment

Well people do what they are allowed to do Yes we want that person that hurt us always to come back and so us what little love they have to give. But at the end it is us that has to overcome them. We move on so why would we want to go back the idea in life is to move on and never look back as much as the other person tries to come we have to be strong and say thanks but no thanks it is wrong for people to play with the hearts and mind with. Be strong do not allow that person to bring you down.

A lot of people wont understand the creative writing parts if these things are posted in open story groups. They'll assume everything to be literal, and you'll spend a lot of time trying to fend off sympathetic replies well after the feelings have left you. Far better to use the poetry groups, I think.

Anyway, I do have a few suggestions.
1- look into your stanzas formation a little bit. It should help with flow and tempo.
2- try to write from outside of the 1st person viewpoint sometimes. It's a great exercise to distance yourself from the piece and should increase your story telling ability within the pieces.

For instance you can replace the I, Me, We words with some She, Her, Them words.

None of this should be taken as a belittlement of the thoughts and feelings contained within your works. Nor is this a comment simply on this 1 writing. I've read all 5 stories, and this is just a small critique as you've asked me to read them.

There's plenty of potential.

Be well
Live happy
Die trying,
Rob

Yes. I'm fine is the single most often told lie. Then there's I'll call you. I'm sure there are a lot of others.

You don't need to talk to him at all, he's a past chapter in your life.....I recently found the courage to rid that person from my life so she couldn't hurt me anymore and it felt so relieving, it still hurts like hell though.

Powerful writing.

I'm so sorry you've been treated so badly. I take comfort in knowing that I've lived well and happy and longer than he did.

Just hang in there, it totally sucks, but you're so young; the whole world lays before you!

People are going away from natural tendency and becoming so unnatural 😒.