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I Love Jokes And Riddles

The day after his wife disappeared in a kayaking accident, an Anchorage man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. “We’re sorry Mr. Williams, but we have some information about your wife,” said one of the troopers. “Tell me! Did you find her?” Williams asked. The troopers looked at each other. One said, “We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which would you like to hear first?” Fearing the worst, Mr. Williams said, “Give me the bad news first.” The trooper said, “I’m sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife’s body in Kachemak Bay.” “Oh no!” exclaimed Williams. Swallowing hard, he asked, “What’s the good news?” The trooper continued, “When we pulled her up, she had 12 twenty-five-pound king crabs and 6 good-sized Dungeness crabs clinging to her, and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch.” Stunned, Mr. Williams demanded, “If that’s the good news, then what’s the great news?” The trooper replied, “We’re gonna pull her up again tomorrow.”
SW-User
This reminds me of another good news/bad news story. A man is sitting in a doctor's consulting room:

Well, we've had the test results back and I'm afraid there's good news and bad news. What would you like first?

The bad news: give it to me straight.

Very well, the tests are positive. There is no cure and you have about 2 months to live.

Bugger me.....What's the good news?

Did you see that gorgeous receptionist sitting at her desk when you came in?

Yes.

Well, I'm shagging her!

 
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