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I Hate Child Abuse

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I am forever perplexed by the 'observation' that those who have been abused are apparently more likely to abuse others later in their own lives. I think it more likely that they would be even more determined to do their bit to stop it happening to anyone else. This is usually part of what keeps them positive about going forward, and the driver behind seeking justice against the abuser. To saddle them with the probability that they too are likely to abuse must be the ultimate hurt.
12 replies
Jan 30, 2017
Miserablegitsometimes · 46-50, M
it must be, but it seems it is a fact though - almost reverse logic applies :)
SW User
Unfortunately, some abused people tend to repeat that behaviour, especially if it was the only thing they knew...others can get out of the suffering, some seek help... very hrd to deal with, when you´ve been abused instead of loved...I pity those poor ones...😞
Valentine · M
I guess that what I'm trying to flush out is that labelling them as 'more likely to abuse' is in itself a sort of abuse. Misfounded.
SW User
@Valentine: It´s not "labelling" as in being´s just a description of reality. Nobody points a finger at them, on the contrary, doctors try to understand them better in order to take the right action..
Valentine · M
@LadyHeartnMind: Thanks - apologies about the typo! :(
That may be true for those who get help or counseling in working through that kind of trauma. Otherwise we tend to do what we know, and react the way our childhood conditioned us. I know several wonderful men who are great fathers but had either abusive or absent fathers themselves. And they [b]did [/b] resolve not to visit upon their children and wives their own experiences, but most had help in reaching that point, where they learned that they didn't have to replicate what they'd witnessed.
stephclaus · 18-21, F
There's either three ways it goes after a person has been abused 1) like you said they will abuse others 2) they will move on with their lives and be constantly reminded of it and needing alot of therapy or 3) they dedicate their lives to a charity/organisation that helps stop abuse or treat those who have been
shadowplay · 18-21, M
one reason this myth continues is ,who are the studies asking ? proven abusers ,the more telling stat is that almost without exception a child abuser will cry abuse ,it's a shit excuse and it's not true ,but it's a convienient way to explain something non abused people will never understand. living through 15 years of extreme abuse taught me so much about pain and the many ways it can be inflicted . i am not capable of making someone feel the way i did. my entire family were abusers . i'm not following in their footsteps .maybe i'm an exception but none of the survivors i know are abusers now . what your talking about is called the vampire theory,if you get bitten your doomed to become's no more true of abused kids than it is of vampires .both are myths. the ultimate abuse is people believing an abusers excuse that he got abused and it's not his fault
Valentine · M
Hi Shadowplay. This is exactly my thinking. I think it important to understand there is no link of any sort, in fact likely to be the opposite.
Gusman · 56-60, MVIP
I was abused as a child and it affected me for many years. With 25 years of alcoholism. When I was finally able to pull myself away from the booze I went out of my way to help those who were being abused.I listened to the children. That is what they crave. Someone to listen to them and help them. I had 3 child tell me they were being molested and I had those abusers imprisoned for their despicable act on their own kids. Years later I received a letter from one of those children thanking me for not only stopping the abuse but believing them.
Why would I want to inflict abuse on a child when I know the lifetime damage it does?

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I Hate Child Abuse
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Updated: 4 wks ago
Categories: Abuse, Health
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