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I Write From The Heart

Today my heart is of stone
My molester as a child had a heart attack today,. I didn't know if I should care if he lives or dies, after all he ruined my life, I forgave him some years back for what he had done. I don't think that means I could just forget about it, after all it haunts me almost every night, and there's things that bring it to mind when I'm awake, a sound, smell or something like that. I guess down deep in the depths of my heart I care about it but I've yet to bring it to the top. I don't feel bad about him suffering though. He is my brother and I should love him, I just can't find it in me at the moment. I guess I'm writing this to get it out of me before I go crazy. Anyways if you read it thank you.
Rick

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SW-User

Dear Rick,
I won't tell you to do this, do that. But rather, I tell you, that really sucks and if you don't feel like forgiving nor forgetting, go ahead, we all need some time. But you know what, you are strong nonetheless, and your battle is half won. For you can come out in the open and brave enough to tell what you've been through. That's progress. In the right direction, hopefully, you will be able to turn this negative experience as a stepping stone to turn you life around. There has to be a reason why it happened, probably to be the voice for those who cannot say what they've been through and choose to be in the dark. Seek out the light.

Footsugar123 · M

I think it happened to me for a reason, I have helped others that have gone though the same or similar things, it helped me to help them, at times it gets to much for me and I go into a depression for a bit. It's hard to understand for someone that hasn't been though it themselves, thank you for being caring and honest, thank you for reading my post to

SW-User

I understand. I have lost a love one, my husband, and it's so outrageous to be listening to people who think they know what you're going through when in fact they haven't experienced it. That is why I said, "I won't tell you to do this and to do that." But having gone through adversity, we somehow have to believe there's got to be a reason why it happened to us.

Well, the battle is half won for you. You share your experience and by doing it, you serve as an inspiration to others. Carry on. You become strong by turning your negative experience into positive.

God bless.

LucyFuhr · 56-60, F

I've felt your pain Bro...

Forgiveness is almost mandatory to your own peace of mind but no one ever said you need to forget. Repressing bad memories doesn't actually make them any better.

I wish you well Rick 🤗

Footsugar123 · M

Yes I know it doesn't make them better, they don't go away, but it makes me able to function in life a little bit better, thank you for reading my post

Jax316 · F

Did this actually happen to you?

Footsugar123 · M

Yes at age 7 he started and for 2 years after, he was finally caught by my mother and sent to a boys home for a few months, came home and started again and even with my sister, until he was told to leave the house,. You might be surprised at how many children this happens to, I have no reason to make up things to write about, if I was to write everything down it would be a very long book and be considered adult reading, thank you for reading my post

coary987 · M

Be strong bro you know I am hear for you all the time

coary987 · M

You be strong bro I am with you all the time.

Butterflykisses24 · 51-55, F

I haven't gotten to the point of forgiveness for my wrong doings to me.I guess you are braver then me.Lots of therapy and emdr therapy has helped me to fuzzy out the past where I choose it to stay.So sorry this happened to you by someone you trusted and so close to you.

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