To anyone who played Elden Ring, how brutal is it ACTUALLY?

considering buying that game, but beyond the fact i'm not 100% sure my laptop can run it (REALLY gotta get a proper gaming rig one of those days), i know of From Software's love of brutal difficulty and never got past Dark Souls 3's first boss (granted the fact i don't have the best patience did nothing to help me in that regard) so i'm worried i just will get promptly destroyed and never finish the game