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When does a step-(dad/mom) becomes a dad/mom? like over years or always introduced as step?

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DunningKruger · 61-69, M
That's a question. I married my step-son's mother when he was about 14, so he was already cooked by the time I entered the picture. I have never felt like "Dad," and I rarely refer to him simply as my son.

In contrast, he recently became engaged to a woman who has two boys from previous relationships. The oldest is 5 now and his biological father isn't involved. My stepson regularly refers to this boy as his son, although the boy calls my stepson by his name.