Thanksgiving is so ingrained into American culture that once a year everyone has to pretend that they enjoy eating turkey, chicken's ugly cousin.

Turkey is the smallest part of my dinner. Stuffing, mini potatoes roasted in turkey juice, roasted brussel sprouts, wild rice, root vegetable casserole, mushroom Wellington, and many other side dishes fill my plate. And then a long walk and then apple pie, pecan pie, and chocolate pie.

I do it all for the pilgrims

Chicken is the blandest and most boring meat there is.

Like there's really nothing more boring and flavorless than a grilled chicken breast