How did you build your own resilience and grew stronger and stronger over the years?

I return to this subject regularly on this page. I have known people whose lives are upended by a divorce, a professional setback. I know individuals who have dealt with the worst that life can throw them – like the death of a child and who have absolutely survived. Never impose your own world view on to another person’s troubles. Never say ‘snap out of it’ to someone who is depressed. And never tell someone in the throes of agony that someone you know has bigger problems than the ones with which they are grappling right now. There are many things in life that are insoluble. Just as you can never legislate for how someone is going to react to a challenge/upheaval/tragedy in his/her/their life. Resilience is a key tool to employ when faced with dark, dire stuff. But we never know how any of us will react to a crisis until we are thrown head-first into its vortex. Resilience is essential… but don’t expect someone else to adopt the same stoical principals as yourself. All crises are profoundly atypical. How did you become more resilient? Over the years, what has made you more resilient? When in Maine I often venture down to the Boston/Cambridge area for a weekend of culture and friends. After all Boston has one of the best orchestras and concert halls of the world. It has astonishingly good museums, several reasonable cinemas (including The Brattle – the last great repertory cinema in the Northeast). It has good theatre, a great early music scene, and has many moments of sublime architectural beauty. It also got chewed up by concrete brutalism in the 1970s… but so much of Boston and Cambridge remain intact and pleasing to the eye.
So why, why, did the city allow this monstrosity (pictured above) to be constructed at the intersection of Newbury Street and Massachusetts Avenue. It is nothing less than horrendous and a testament to the school of architecture that has destroyed the financial district of London (‘the City’) not to mention the Old Street roundabout near my flat in Shoreditch. Why are architects so unimaginative and why do city planner allow such trash to desecrate a brilliantly historical stretch of Boston?
I am not against modernness. I am against ugliness.