Did you ever feel that the odds were stacked against you?
Why is everything stacked against me? When in your life were the odds stacked against you but you overcame them to succeed?
Why is it all stacked against me? It was my birthday yesterday. Instead of celebrating I stayed in bed and felt sorry for myself. The girlfriend left me a few months ago which ruined me. Familiar story I know well the breakup hurt me and I'd attempted to OD. What can I say? Maybe some people aren't equipped to climb out of the pit.
So I spent my birthday in bed and the next day is a day of mourning as it's the day my pops died. 12 years today. So I wake up feeling awful I drag myself across London to university. I can't afford to pay the 17 pound ticket because I haven't gotten my student loans yet. So to save money I didn't touch my ticket until I get to central London because I can pay 7 pounds rather than 17. 10 pounds really goes along way when you're broke. And I get stopped on this day of all and get slapped with a 40 pound fine. One which I can totally afford...
It's all just gotten too much. Why me! I had to back away from the track as I was handed my fine in case I did something really stupid again. I can't afford to pay this because I've got no money. It really has been a lovely 20th birthday and a beautiful 12 years without my pops. I seem to be getting on so well 4 months after my break up and 7 weeks after my OD. I'm trying to not cry on this train. I'm bleeding inside. I wish someone could help me. I'm waiting to get better but my thoughts are scaring me paticularly right now. I just hope i can make it to university and not do something stupid. I need to keep myself occupied so this journey gets shorter. I miss being normal and happy. Single mom at 19 w two kids. Went to college, raised my kids at the same time, been a software dev for 20+ years, kids are grown, one is a tech repair guy and the other is an office manager for a factory. No it's not easy raising kids alone, especially when you are young, but so what? It can be done, and that was good enough for me. Somewhere around 4 years ago I was at this camp that had multiple activities, but none of them peaked my interest enough to partake. I went to the activities with a younger friend to show my support, but he was so outgoing and persuasive that I too participated.
There was one challenge in particular that I found intriguing. It involved archery. I was a fairly decent archer so I didn’t want to ruin the fun for the rest of the participants. After a few short minutes of mocking, I succumbed to the ridicule and picked up a bow. These bows were in such bad condition it physically hurt me to look at it. The compound bows wires looked as though they hadn’t been waxed since they were bought and the frame was way too small for me. In addition, the pull weight was roughly 20 pounds lighter than what I’m used to and I couldn’t draw all the way back either. It gets worse however. The arrows were completely destroyed. The fletchings were manhandled and the notches were broken. I accepted anyway knowing it was a challenge to regain my honor from those that foolishly mocked me. The first two “tests” were basically to weed out anyone that couldn’t shoot a bow straight. The third challenge involved beating the archery instructor. I thought it would be a cake walk because he too would be distraught by the state of his equipment, but I was wrong. He brought out his own personal compound and new quiver of arrows. Needless to say, I lost. The next day I challenged him to a rematch and he performed the same score, but I had been training with a different instructor for this challenge. I barely beat him. I thought it was over but they had a challenge they thought no one could do so they gave it to me. About 10 yards out they put a target and fastened a foam pool noodle sticking out toward me. They gave me five arrows and told me to put an arrow through the hole in the noodle. I honestly was going to just throw in the towel since the odds were so against me at that point, but the younger friend from earlier supported me enough to make me want to at least try. The first four arrows missed, but it was enough for me to test where I would need to aim. I fired the last arrow and the wobbly, broken little guy shook his way through the noodle, promptly stripping the fletchings and causing me a massive cringe. Regardless of that I did complete the challenge and felt pretty damn good about the whole thing.
I feel like I am only as good as my worst quality. I'm 5'8''', don't have a great personality, passive by nature, less than average in the downstairs department , not very intelligent and getting older.
People love to tell me how negative I am, or how I quote on qoute need to go to therapy but maybe they are right. since I'm so lazy and borderline depressed.
How do you overcome the odds when everything is stacked against you to fail?
I come from a really shitty background. I barely graduated high school, suffered years with depression, have no education past high schooland I'm very poor. Its pure hell to leave my house but hopefully I'll be starting trade school next year lTo top that off, I'm black, and female so the chances of me being successful in anything is so silm. Since the odds are stacked against me I'm lazy since I always think that I can't amount to anything because I'm not privileged, I'm poor, and I have no college education. I feel like I let these things bring me down a lot. I know these are really huge barriers but it makes me not really want to work at anything.
There's this thing that you want to do. The odds are heavily stacked against you. In such a scenario, it's easy to look at others who got the thing that you want, and feel like "oh they just got lucky."
No, no, no.
There is a fundamental difference between the person who gets that incredible thing they want, and the person who doesn't. We both know that the odds of getting this thing is a million to one. The question is, are we willing to fail a million times before getting it? Not just that but keep trying with the same enthusiasm and energy on the millionth attempt as the first attempt?
That's what makes the difference. Learning how to not get disappointed with failure, and continuously coming back for more. To be able to see both success and failure with equanimity, and then to keep showing up. The difference between people who get what they want and people who don't is simply that they try so many more times going after the same thing, that eventually things start to line up in their favor. They are willing to shoulder the pain and consequences of all the failures along the way. They keep working on the skills that will unlock that thing they are going after. Yes, the odds are a million to one. But are you willing to try a million times? Because luck only happens with sufficient volume of work.
An investment firm has recently contracted me about my pitch deck and they might even consider meeting me in person...
I just kinda feel like this is insane.....
It actually saddens me to see how little I think of myself. My GF broke up with me and I've just become more and more fixated as the months have gone on. Initially I dealt with the breakup well but I think it's because I thought she would reach out. The relationship was also fresh in my memory so I has the confidence that my ex found me attractive. She was pretty so why wouldn't other girls feel the same? As time goes on, especially with covid and lockdowns I have regressed big time. I've become obsessed with porn and my guy downstairs and my lack of size and sensitivity. Our sex life wasnt great mewbtly because I have no sensitivity there. This has left me with some hangups. In the relationship it was extremely frustrating and sad but my ex was as understanding as she could be. Now I have to go into a new world whenever covid ends and go through the whole pre sex uncertainty even if I find a girl that finds me attractive and interesting.
Why is it all stacked against me? It was my birthday yesterday. Instead of celebrating I stayed in bed and felt sorry for myself. The girlfriend left me a few months ago which ruined me. Familiar story I know well the breakup hurt me and I'd attempted to OD. What can I say? Maybe some people aren't equipped to climb out of the pit.
So I spent my birthday in bed and the next day is a day of mourning as it's the day my pops died. 12 years today. So I wake up feeling awful I drag myself across London to university. I can't afford to pay the 17 pound ticket because I haven't gotten my student loans yet. So to save money I didn't touch my ticket until I get to central London because I can pay 7 pounds rather than 17. 10 pounds really goes along way when you're broke. And I get stopped on this day of all and get slapped with a 40 pound fine. One which I can totally afford...
It's all just gotten too much. Why me! I had to back away from the track as I was handed my fine in case I did something really stupid again. I can't afford to pay this because I've got no money. It really has been a lovely 20th birthday and a beautiful 12 years without my pops. I seem to be getting on so well 4 months after my break up and 7 weeks after my OD. I'm trying to not cry on this train. I'm bleeding inside. I wish someone could help me. I'm waiting to get better but my thoughts are scaring me paticularly right now. I just hope i can make it to university and not do something stupid. I need to keep myself occupied so this journey gets shorter. I miss being normal and happy. Single mom at 19 w two kids. Went to college, raised my kids at the same time, been a software dev for 20+ years, kids are grown, one is a tech repair guy and the other is an office manager for a factory. No it's not easy raising kids alone, especially when you are young, but so what? It can be done, and that was good enough for me. Somewhere around 4 years ago I was at this camp that had multiple activities, but none of them peaked my interest enough to partake. I went to the activities with a younger friend to show my support, but he was so outgoing and persuasive that I too participated.
There was one challenge in particular that I found intriguing. It involved archery. I was a fairly decent archer so I didn’t want to ruin the fun for the rest of the participants. After a few short minutes of mocking, I succumbed to the ridicule and picked up a bow. These bows were in such bad condition it physically hurt me to look at it. The compound bows wires looked as though they hadn’t been waxed since they were bought and the frame was way too small for me. In addition, the pull weight was roughly 20 pounds lighter than what I’m used to and I couldn’t draw all the way back either. It gets worse however. The arrows were completely destroyed. The fletchings were manhandled and the notches were broken. I accepted anyway knowing it was a challenge to regain my honor from those that foolishly mocked me. The first two “tests” were basically to weed out anyone that couldn’t shoot a bow straight. The third challenge involved beating the archery instructor. I thought it would be a cake walk because he too would be distraught by the state of his equipment, but I was wrong. He brought out his own personal compound and new quiver of arrows. Needless to say, I lost. The next day I challenged him to a rematch and he performed the same score, but I had been training with a different instructor for this challenge. I barely beat him. I thought it was over but they had a challenge they thought no one could do so they gave it to me. About 10 yards out they put a target and fastened a foam pool noodle sticking out toward me. They gave me five arrows and told me to put an arrow through the hole in the noodle. I honestly was going to just throw in the towel since the odds were so against me at that point, but the younger friend from earlier supported me enough to make me want to at least try. The first four arrows missed, but it was enough for me to test where I would need to aim. I fired the last arrow and the wobbly, broken little guy shook his way through the noodle, promptly stripping the fletchings and causing me a massive cringe. Regardless of that I did complete the challenge and felt pretty damn good about the whole thing.
I feel like I am only as good as my worst quality. I'm 5'8''', don't have a great personality, passive by nature, less than average in the downstairs department , not very intelligent and getting older.
People love to tell me how negative I am, or how I quote on qoute need to go to therapy but maybe they are right. since I'm so lazy and borderline depressed.
How do you overcome the odds when everything is stacked against you to fail?
I come from a really shitty background. I barely graduated high school, suffered years with depression, have no education past high schooland I'm very poor. Its pure hell to leave my house but hopefully I'll be starting trade school next year lTo top that off, I'm black, and female so the chances of me being successful in anything is so silm. Since the odds are stacked against me I'm lazy since I always think that I can't amount to anything because I'm not privileged, I'm poor, and I have no college education. I feel like I let these things bring me down a lot. I know these are really huge barriers but it makes me not really want to work at anything.
There's this thing that you want to do. The odds are heavily stacked against you. In such a scenario, it's easy to look at others who got the thing that you want, and feel like "oh they just got lucky."
No, no, no.
There is a fundamental difference between the person who gets that incredible thing they want, and the person who doesn't. We both know that the odds of getting this thing is a million to one. The question is, are we willing to fail a million times before getting it? Not just that but keep trying with the same enthusiasm and energy on the millionth attempt as the first attempt?
That's what makes the difference. Learning how to not get disappointed with failure, and continuously coming back for more. To be able to see both success and failure with equanimity, and then to keep showing up. The difference between people who get what they want and people who don't is simply that they try so many more times going after the same thing, that eventually things start to line up in their favor. They are willing to shoulder the pain and consequences of all the failures along the way. They keep working on the skills that will unlock that thing they are going after. Yes, the odds are a million to one. But are you willing to try a million times? Because luck only happens with sufficient volume of work.
An investment firm has recently contracted me about my pitch deck and they might even consider meeting me in person...
I just kinda feel like this is insane.....
It actually saddens me to see how little I think of myself. My GF broke up with me and I've just become more and more fixated as the months have gone on. Initially I dealt with the breakup well but I think it's because I thought she would reach out. The relationship was also fresh in my memory so I has the confidence that my ex found me attractive. She was pretty so why wouldn't other girls feel the same? As time goes on, especially with covid and lockdowns I have regressed big time. I've become obsessed with porn and my guy downstairs and my lack of size and sensitivity. Our sex life wasnt great mewbtly because I have no sensitivity there. This has left me with some hangups. In the relationship it was extremely frustrating and sad but my ex was as understanding as she could be. Now I have to go into a new world whenever covid ends and go through the whole pre sex uncertainty even if I find a girl that finds me attractive and interesting.
