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Imagine finding out your mom has schizophrenia at age 55

She's kept it from me my entire life. I knew she was a really crummy mom in multiple ways & I knew something was wrong with her but I always made excuses for her in my mind. I can't help but feel very resentful that she never told me she has a serious mental illness. I found out by taking care of her in another state for 3 weeks thinking she had dementia, & she let a "metformin prescribed by a psychiatrist" statement slip. I researched this & know it runs on her dad's side of the family & is prescribed for psychosis/schizophrenia.
Iamonfire666 · 31-35, F Best Comment
She should have told you and I am sure that past events now make sense to you.
D7A7G7 · F
[@10165,Iamonfire666] I agree! I would never keep a mental illness from my child for multiple reasons. Shame on my mom. I sure have been a great daughter to her, & will always know I did everything I could for her. I do love her so very much.
Iamonfire666 · 31-35, F
[@1208288,D7A7G7] I am sorry she kept it from you.
D7A7G7 · F
[@10165,Iamonfire666] Thank you for saying that.

RoxClymer · 36-40, M
the thing that strikes me about cases like this is that the parent didn't tell the child, so the child could tak possible preventative measures, and now the grow child is dealing with it

different genetics but I'm dealing with it now. my grandmother (dad's mom) didn't say anything at all, until mom was 6 months along with me
and I was born with Spina bifida
D7A7G7 · F
[@575075,RoxClymer] well I had to piece it together. My mom is quite intelligent and I understand how she was able to keep it from me.
RoxClymer · 36-40, M
[@1208288,D7A7G7] still she should have told you as soon as she knew, for Your sake, "this is in the family, do what you can to prevent it" kind of thing
D7A7G7 · F
[@575075,RoxClymer] I agree completely. One day I may bring it up if the time is right, but I don't want to upset her.
Eddiesolds · 56-60, M
Just love her with all your heart now.Dont be resentful towards her. Please dont. Just help her as much as you can. She did her best.I feel for her. I'm so sorry
D7A7G7 · F
[@438210,Eddiesolds] I'm very good to her. If you only knew. I do have a right to be upset and my feelings about it are very normal.
Eddiesolds · 56-60, M
[@1208288,D7A7G7] I'm sure you do. Just like I do. I've never experienced this though. I didnt mean to offend you.
D7A7G7 · F
[@438210,Eddiesolds] You didn't offend me at all. Thank you for taking the time to comment.:)
4meAndyou · F
I thought metformin was a drug used for diabetes? The third ex was prescribed it for his diabetes.
4meAndyou · F
[@1208288,D7A7G7] THAT is the pure truth. I do forget about him, mostly...but your question just made me realize he was a true psycho.
D7A7G7 · F
[@387713,4meAndyou] At least you know and can move on.
4meAndyou · F
[@1208288,D7A7G7] Oh, I did. Divorced since 2009.
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
Maybe she didn't want to be judged...
D7A7G7 · F
[@516864,ozgirl512] A mother has a responsibility to her child to help them perceive the world as it is, not from a warped sick perspective. She's a PhD & knows better.
GhostPoncho · 46-50, M
Must be a mild case.
D7A7G7 · F
[@903658,GhostPoncho] They think she has dementia at this point, but they're becoming confused because she passed the dementia pre screen today.
GhostPoncho · 46-50, M
[@1208288,D7A7G7] one day at a time…she may need to be institutionalized
D7A7G7 · F
[@903658,GhostPoncho] No. She can live with me before that happens. Thank you for trying to help me.
Kumbayakid · 61-69, M
Sorry to hear that ☹️
D7A7G7 · F
[@345745,Kumbayakid] Unbelievable, I know.
Mental illness comes with a lot of stigma attached to it... maybe she wanted to protect you and herself from that by hiding her illness and the longer it went on, the easier it became???
D7A7G7 · F
[@421598,Becksta] No, I'm actually very healthy and stable. To be raised by a mentally ill person and not know it is wrong.
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
[@1208288,D7A7G7] Yet she still hid it from you... Have you asked her?
D7A7G7 · F
[@516864,ozgirl512] I suppose she's embarrassed and thinks she's going to lose her freedom. Her dad was committed.
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
[@1208288,D7A7G7] I think I'd agree with that... Imagine having the intellect to gain would, but knowing you also carry that burden... It would not have been easy for her
D7A7G7 · F
[@516864,ozgirl512] No, but life was made much more difficult for me. Her behavior was selfish, self serving, irresponsible. Unacceptable to me.
Tomtracy438 · 36-40, M
that is messed up..so sorry
Tomtracy438 · 36-40, M
[@1208288,D7A7G7] good stay strong
D7A7G7 · F
[@3441,Tomtracy438] I am. I'm just very spent.
Tomtracy438 · 36-40, M
[@1208288,D7A7G7] i am sure
Wiseacre · F
I wouldn’t blame her for not telling u!
D7A7G7 · F
[@426791,Wiseacre] I do blame her. I should know that a serious mental illness runs in the family at least 3 generations. I should know why she tried to commit suicide twice. I should know why she did terrible things in front of me. I should know why she told me to have sex with boys when I was in high school so I wouldn't eat so much. I should know why she said I was a role model for her. I should know why my own mom was jealous of me, why she behaved so strangely, and was verbally abusive. I should know a lot of things so I can process my life's events in a logical healthy way. She stole that from me by thinking of herself instead of her own child.
Wiseacre · F
Should this, should that...too late for that. Forgiveness...the woman is sick![@1208288,D7A7G7]

 
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