Is messing up your kids inevitable?

Yes. But it also doesn't have to be something you do on purpose (like abuse or manipulation).

Almost, but not quite, I think. Most people start reproducing at a time when they haven't got much of a clue about life either - too inexperienced, though they might think they know it all; part of immaturity. Some people realise they need to learn a fair bit before risking damaging another generation of humans by reproducing too early, or ever.

definitely not

I think it is. You mess them up by being too hard on them, too soft on them, loving them too little or too much, etc. Humans are all flawed so it is inevitable that our parents were responsible for at least some of our flaws.

That’s why the elders were intended to raise the youth because the parents are still having their experience, while the elders are experienced.

No. My sister has healthy and happy teens now. It's possible to not screw other people up.

If you don’t , the government will mess them up ten times worse

It's part of the job really

Hopefully not. But even the best parents make mistakes, unfortunately.