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Would u date someone who is married but, "separated" ?

I think its important to keep an open mind about this. Just because someone is in a difficult situation they should not be penalized for the choices that they have made. So it is not good to judge people who are in something that is not easy to get out of. Because it could easily be you. And the right person just might come along even when you are still technically...married.
Do you agree. What do you think SW. 🙂

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SW-User

I’m basically in that situation right now, and the [i]last[/i] thing I want to do is bring someone new into the picture. Before I even consider dating or anything like that, I’ll have to be divorced.

Synyster · 51-55, M

@SW-User

indyjoe · 56-60, M

I was in that situation...Separated is still married until that final divorce decree is given. I would not date let alone pursue any woman when my ex wife and I were apart as long as we were still legally married, and I would not date anyone else in that situation either. I do not think it is a matter of being judgmental, but more of an issue of principle and ethics. There is also another problem or two...you could find yourself in love with that person and they end up going back with their spouse, also it could blow up in a person's face in divorce court. As long as they are legally married, being with anyone else in any way could be considered adultery and used against them (something a lot of people don't even think about). Before my divorce was final I was still a married man (even though my ex and I had not lived together for two years), and that's how I viewed anyone else in that situation.

SW-User

I actually did, and it turned out to be a catastrophe. It’s best to date them when they’re divorced and free from all obligations from their broken marriage.

SW-User

Did the other person end up getting back together with the spouse, or was the issue that they just had too much emotional baggage and unresolved issues to be entering into a new relationship?
@SW-User

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@SW-User Hmmmmmmmmm. Thank you. 🙂

SW-User

@SW-User His wife and him were trying to get a divorce. It took so long that there was no time for him to invest in his relationship with me. So you can guess how the rest of the story goes...

SW-User

Personally, I think it is unwise because he or she is not officially divorced.. yet.. So, technically he or she is still married.
They are separated, God knows they might want to get back.

FigNewton

There's a risk of being dragged into the divorce discussion (a colleague of mine is going through that now) but I think I would.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@FigNewton Thank you.

SW-User

no. spare me the drama plz.
it's not like he's the only man in the whole world or I can't find another man that's single...

Synyster · 51-55, M

Separated as in living together? NO

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Synyster · 51-55, M

@Zonuss People need to get their shit together before dating or entering in a relationship. This isn't high school anymore, like, don't dump your girlfriend until you have another.

SW-User

Agreed. In my mind, it’s unfair to the person you’re starting to date. For starters, how can you really give a new relationship a chance to grow when you’re still picking up the pieces from the old one? When someone’s house gets destroyed by a tornado, they don’t build the new one on top of the rubble. They clear the debris and start on a new and solid foundation.
@Synyster

Synyster · 51-55, M

@SW-User Couldn't agree more. The old saying, clean the garage before you move. You can't bring someone into life when you're not 100% committed.

Threepio

I once did. And she was married but separated from one of my peers. Fortunately he was on assignment far far away....

After about a month I knew why he was divorcing her..... :( :(

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@Threepio 🤭 Oooooops.

booboo · M

I wouldn't.. you want your 'date' to be emotionally available, and only being separated IMHO doesn't permit that...

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@booboo It depends on the person.

dinonuggies · 100+, M

I want to date someone married but idk

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dinonuggies · 100+, M

@Zonuss attraction
Chemistry
My
Typeeeee

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@dinonuggies Weeeeeeeeeeeeee. 🙂

dinonuggies · 100+, M

@Zonuss we like each other but one of us is married

saragoodtimes · F

once you realize the marriage is finished it's ok to accept a date. life is for the living

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@saragoodtimes Well said. Life must indeed go on. 🙂

indyjoe · 56-60, M

@Zonuss And it will...when the divorce is final and the healing has begun.

SimpleJess · 22-25, F

Well if both parties are ready to move on I don't see what's wrong with it lol

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@SimpleJess I totally agree.

SmartKat · 56-60, F

Not sure. I did it before and it turned out well. But I’m more cautious now.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@SmartKat Cautious Kat. 🙂

Keepitsimple · 51-55, F

Nah. Waste of time. They have too much baggage fresh off of that. I’d be a rebound.

SW-User

I did. For 7 years

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@SW-User What happened. 🤔

SW-User

@Zonuss moved out of London, wastes 25k on a deposit for an flat for us, plus whatever else on the whole thing. I met someone else.

cycleman · 61-69, M

I did.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@cycleman 🙂

Newfound · 41-45, M

Nah

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

Been in that situation. I don't judge, but that situation isn't for me.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@uncalled4 Fair point. Thank you. 🙂

PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M

Wouldn't actively seek one out, but I would be with someone who is separated as long as I am satisfied that they have moved on. Sure, there is a certain chance there will be complications, but that may very well be a good test of strenght for a potential relationship and end up strengthening it in the long run.

This message was deleted by its author.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@sspec A direct answer today. You are so awesome. 🙂

This message was deleted by its author.

Zonuss · 41-45, M

@sspec🤭

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