Want some unsolicited advice from an old man?

@Anonymartyr that’s a sad sign of the times

@Anonymartyr I wondered if she was embarrassed or ashamed?

@cherokeepatti She seemed really disappointed that I wasn't a World Of Warcraft player. I want to live life, not hide from it. Physically it is getting too hard to functionally live alone anymore but I'm years away from qualifying for any help. The help is only available for seniors I am not one for another 12 years I am probably never getting out of a bed again within 5.

@Anonymartyr But she couldn’t meet you and you lived 2 blocks from her. Sounds like she needed to grow up.

@Anonymartyr Terrible to hear, (God that sounds so trite) but man, you're so young. Having been in the medical field I can empathize with the hardships you endure on a daily basis.

@Grateful4you Sort of, I suspect. Most people with social media/MMORPG addiction suffer from low self esteem. Low self esteem is cured by experience and propagated by avoiding experiences. Everybody fears the unknown. Low self esteem is fear of self. The only way to improve self image is to experience yourself in all manner of things thus learning both your strengths and weaknesses.
I met her on a dating site but it became evident that she never expected a serious reply and was grossly unprepared. She expected me (or any man) to wait for months while she sorted through her family, local friends and social media time in order to make room in her life for me. To me, that is like applying for a job and then expecting the employer to wait months while they keep working for the former employer.

@cherokeepatti I am 53, she is 48.

@Anonymartyr It seems I will always be alone as I cannot find anyone with any time and who is not looking for rich men.

@Anonymartyr that’s not much of an age difference...but it seems she didn’t want to grow up & be an adult. Just play around texting & video games, that’s not a real relationship, it’s kid stuff. Seems like she could have been a catfish or something if she didn’t want to meet you.

@Anonymartyr Thank you for expanding on this unfortunately most aren't "getting it" I think the self esteem issue will manifest in some serious maladaptive behaviors. (Depression, suicidal ideations, hostility and even aggression) It's all mushroomed faster than we could anticipate social/psychological outcomes.

@Grateful4you I was born with osteoporosis but not diagnosed until age 47. I had lost 20% of my bone density by then and haven severe compression fractures from T4-T11 vertebrae resulting in pronounced kaiphosis. i depend on a walker but my knees and hips are just starting to give out now. I will end up evicted eventually because I cannot do much house chores- nor could I make love conventionally for that matter. None of my medications are covered under our health care either.

@cherokeepatti And all the others on the dating sites are looking for rich men, or at least men that are able to travel. I am always alone, no family ever and my only friend never has any time for me and avoids anything that requires effort. My cat is my only real companion but she cannot help with chores or rent nor can she converse with me although she tries. I am afraid of my future. I would rather be terminal than to be living a long life alone confined to a bed. If there is no one to visit with me now there won't be anyone then either.

@Anonymartyr Damn, I hate hearing this. I don't know the state you reside in. Here in Ca. we have decent housing for folks 50 and over with debilitating disease, that and a caregiver. I am Medi/Medi, with an acute spine, most my medical is covered and I have great pain management.

Wish I was better qualified to advise.

@Grateful4you I am in Windsor, Ontario, Canada. I advocate for the poor and homeless here ( I was homeless just 4 years ago). Our so-called free health care only covers generic medications, none of which apply to me. I cannot have pain medications for my arthritis because they are contrary to my condition.

@Anonymartyr I'm awfully sorry. Pain meds. contraindicated with arthritis? I have an arthritic spine and been on opiods nearly 20 years.
Unless contraindicated for the Osteoporosis I'm missing something here.

@Grateful4you Most post-menopausal osteoporosis is CAUSED by pain medications not by nursing children. research has been made into marijuana not only for pain but also for balancing the bone-growth to bone-loss ratio. This matters little since my disability benefits pay only enough for half of the rent anywhere in the province. Either I get a common-law spouse or go back to the street when my temporary subsidies expire in a couple years. How is a broke cripple supposed to get a wife in order to survive? Dating sites are no good for me.

@Anonymartyr ...And I'm feeling helpless, just out of ideas. Sounds goofy, but maybe start a "Go fund me" page. Or perhaps there is someone who can help you start one. There HAS to be a solution here somewhere. Man, this is just awful.😥

@Anonymartyr What I have is called juvenile osteoporosis. If I had a family somebody may have noticed while I was young but I only had some ignorant and abusive relatives that kept me from my mother. Essentially I have been on my own since the fourth grade.

@Anonymartyr You are indeed the ultimate survivor, no one should have to have gone through all of this. You write like someone with an advanced degree. Perhaps there is something you haven't thought of that can generate more income. I know there must be. You have such a great mastery of language, great insight, etc. I'm not giving up on you...something will happen.

@Grateful4you There is no help available and it would not be legal for me to raise funds in that manner. There would be help and medications if I were a drug addict or alcoholic but not for middle-aged men, nor crippled people nor for seniors Which make up most of the homeless in Canada.I have books here on all available help but none of it applies to me, mostly because I am too young to need that kind of help. To raise money, like a fund raiser, I would be required to be a registered charitable organization. There are no such organizations already available which I do not already have but their help expires in a couple more years, as it is only for a seven year period. I have already been on them almost four years.

@Grateful4you Formally, I have a grade twelve diploma from a regular public high school. I have read and studied a lot independently in order to survive my "family". I am now the only survivor assuming that my drug addict cousin has most likely fatally overdosed by now. It was working to pay rent that crippled my spine I had to take what employment was available: low-wage labour.

@Anonymartyr I have no clue about systems in Canada. I'm out of ideas for now, and my cognition heavily impaired by tiredness. I just wish there was something I could do. Just don't give up hope, not yet.

@Grateful4you Long ago people would have helped but nobody helps their neighbours anymore, they prefer to be afraid of them instead. I stopped fearing the world long ago. I learned that I only need to trust myself i do not need to think about whether I trust anyone else as I only need to trust myself in the situation or get out of it.
Thanks for talking with me.

@Anonymartyr As I said, I'm not giving up on you. Somewhere, somehow, there must be a helpful solution. I'm not here every day, but will keep my eyes open and try and keep in touch.

@Grateful4you I am rarely on here anymore since there is not much for me on this site or any "social" site. I get on here when I feel extra lonely but other than occupying some of my time, does little for me. I have nothing to talk about in my life as I can't have a life. I have my past experiences to talk about but then I get the nightmares again. Thanks again for the faith in me. Often I wish that I weren't so strong. I am tired of boredom and of suffering. I wish I knew what it is like to be loved by a person, in person rather than thousand of miles away. But even my wife was only using me for her self-esteem and I hardly knew my mother.