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Would you rather be a cynical nihilist or a cynical idealist?

I tend to be a cynical idealist. I think of how amazing everything COULD be but then get down because I realize it never shall be.

I feel like a cynical nihilist wouldn't get as down because I'm the end, it wouldn't matter anyways.
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SW-User
If ones nihilism doesn’t encourage active self-transformation, revaluation and self critisism, they’re doing it wrong.

And I agree, life is but a bunch of experiences. Make them good or make them bad... I try to be a realist.