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rckt148 · 61-69, M
thats where people mess up
if you know something about them needs to be changed
then ya should have left them alone to start with
someone would be happy to have them as they are
and you could find someone you like as they are ,,,,
But NO ,,we all have to try and fix something until we Break them
And then toss them away ,,leaving someone else to get stuck with your broken toy
So now we have a society full of broken people
because some jerk who could not fix him or her self ,
tried to fix other people
They were not broken ,
Like a car ,not all of them will suit you
We should pick mates like we pick cars and clothes
then maybe we would be happier with the model we have
if you know something about them needs to be changed
then ya should have left them alone to start with
someone would be happy to have them as they are
and you could find someone you like as they are ,,,,
But NO ,,we all have to try and fix something until we Break them
And then toss them away ,,leaving someone else to get stuck with your broken toy
So now we have a society full of broken people
because some jerk who could not fix him or her self ,
tried to fix other people
They were not broken ,
Like a car ,not all of them will suit you
We should pick mates like we pick cars and clothes
then maybe we would be happier with the model we have
appassionata · 36-40, M
@rckt148 maybe people have an ideal standard and an achievable standard. and maybe sometimes they are not the same.
JovialPlutonian · 36-40, M
@rckt148 I'd change her face!
JovialPlutonian · 36-40, M
@rckt148 can't stand it
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@appassionata so if you settle ,then settle
don't try to fix someone who is not broken
Its taken me a life time to figure out who I was and wanted to be
trying to recover and get over all the crap others did not like about me
I was good enough to support them ,make sacrifices that cost me
and then when I am in bad health I get tossed away ?
Its my fault ,I should not have allowed it to be so one way
Had I been asked to change certain things ,I would have gladly ,that what people who love each other do .
bit when you belittle someone ,knock them and down them and complain
all you do it tear them down ,your not helping them
Making someone fell worthless is the most heartless thing anyone can do
but its caused from seeing something you like ,and you think you'll just work on the rest ,,
When all along the ones that was perfect was maybe there for ya all along
but you were to busy trying to make someone else into something they are not
I like the power and speed of my Mustang ,but I love the ride of my Caddy
But I have sense enough to know I can't turn a Mustang in to a Caddy nor a Caddy into a Mustang
And I don't take my tools to either trying to make them into something their not
We as I said should pick our mates like we pick our cars
we can do some upgrades with a little money and TLC
But just taking a hammer to its not going to cut it ,,all we do is make it less attracting and broken
don't try to fix someone who is not broken
Its taken me a life time to figure out who I was and wanted to be
trying to recover and get over all the crap others did not like about me
I was good enough to support them ,make sacrifices that cost me
and then when I am in bad health I get tossed away ?
Its my fault ,I should not have allowed it to be so one way
Had I been asked to change certain things ,I would have gladly ,that what people who love each other do .
bit when you belittle someone ,knock them and down them and complain
all you do it tear them down ,your not helping them
Making someone fell worthless is the most heartless thing anyone can do
but its caused from seeing something you like ,and you think you'll just work on the rest ,,
When all along the ones that was perfect was maybe there for ya all along
but you were to busy trying to make someone else into something they are not
I like the power and speed of my Mustang ,but I love the ride of my Caddy
But I have sense enough to know I can't turn a Mustang in to a Caddy nor a Caddy into a Mustang
And I don't take my tools to either trying to make them into something their not
We as I said should pick our mates like we pick our cars
we can do some upgrades with a little money and TLC
But just taking a hammer to its not going to cut it ,,all we do is make it less attracting and broken
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@JovialPlutonian then you should have left her be to start with
all that info can do it break her ,she sure can't change who she is
all that info can do it break her ,she sure can't change who she is
appassionata · 36-40, M
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@appassionata now when its open communication ,mutual respect thats one thing
but from my experience thats not how it usually works now days .
We see another model that appeals to us and then pick the model we have apart
then you end up with the new model and once under the hood ,you see the new model has way more miles than you see from the road .
The old faithful model now looks pretty good ,but now its broken from being kicked to the curb ,and sometimes the damage from that can't be fixed .
The best marriages I know of were ones the wife was the mans back bone until he finally grew one of his own .
They over looked things ,and ignored things until he figured out what he had
And the guys are all happy now their women put up with them
and the funny things is
the girls anyone could have at the pool hall with the hot pants and short skits now all look like hell
and its funny how their sweet little wives just got prettier with age
I have spoken with a lot of couples over the years ,about what I did wrong and ways I learned from experience ,and even with my own kids ,my oldest is 41
we all have to learn our own ways I guess
But now my girls and also my Granddaughters too ask
How did you know he was a jerk ,how did you see through him and no one else did ?
I used to be one of those jerks ,takes one to know one
And I have asked a lot of questions as to how the marriages that last lasted
And you are right in your point
mutual respect ,and getting to know one another ,likes and dislikes
But we should do some more of that when were dating ,,
not after we have settled and the infatuation is gone ,,you took them to bed
That initial excitement does seem to cloud out judgment ,
until we are older and know how to control it better
I myself will never settle again ,,I have had enough cars and woman now
I know exactly what I want in both
but from my experience thats not how it usually works now days .
We see another model that appeals to us and then pick the model we have apart
then you end up with the new model and once under the hood ,you see the new model has way more miles than you see from the road .
The old faithful model now looks pretty good ,but now its broken from being kicked to the curb ,and sometimes the damage from that can't be fixed .
The best marriages I know of were ones the wife was the mans back bone until he finally grew one of his own .
They over looked things ,and ignored things until he figured out what he had
And the guys are all happy now their women put up with them
and the funny things is
the girls anyone could have at the pool hall with the hot pants and short skits now all look like hell
and its funny how their sweet little wives just got prettier with age
I have spoken with a lot of couples over the years ,about what I did wrong and ways I learned from experience ,and even with my own kids ,my oldest is 41
we all have to learn our own ways I guess
But now my girls and also my Granddaughters too ask
How did you know he was a jerk ,how did you see through him and no one else did ?
I used to be one of those jerks ,takes one to know one
And I have asked a lot of questions as to how the marriages that last lasted
And you are right in your point
mutual respect ,and getting to know one another ,likes and dislikes
But we should do some more of that when were dating ,,
not after we have settled and the infatuation is gone ,,you took them to bed
That initial excitement does seem to cloud out judgment ,
until we are older and know how to control it better
I myself will never settle again ,,I have had enough cars and woman now
I know exactly what I want in both
appassionata · 36-40, M
@rckt148 you have a very cynical outlook it seems. if its because of bad experiences i hope you can let them go.
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@JovialPlutonian Glad to hear that ,for her as well as you
I hope your very happy
I hope one day I get a change to be again as well
I'll do alot better next time I can assure you of that .
I hope your very happy
I hope one day I get a change to be again as well
I'll do alot better next time I can assure you of that .
rckt148 · 61-69, M
@appassionata I am not cynical ,,I can admit I was the blame for most of my failures ,because I settled .
I had never been alone since I was around 14
I had someone in my bed every night ,
But when the new fades both grow tired of things they didn't take the time to see (you never really know someone ,you know what they want you to know ,but if they love you enough ,they let you in )
But I never waited that long ,she was pretty ,she was willing to sleep with me
lets move in together
But after a while she is complaining ,I was complaining ,throw in some friends with big mouths and attitudes and soon its a pain fest
I hate this about her ,she hates this about me ,things are said ya can't take back and soon your roommates who hate each other ,to scared to be alone to end it
but no now I am good ,I took 6 yrs to get to know me
and to get over the last one
2 of my ex's and I get along ,soon I am going to attempt to make it 3
Go see her and tell her I am sorry ,even though we both done things wrong
I loved them all ,I don't want any of them hating me forever
when we just picked the wrong models and tried to make them into something they were never meant to be ,and vice versa
Remember ,you are the one who made the post about changing someone
I just gave you some examples as to why I think its a mistake
Get to know them to start with ,and then if you go further
be happy with what you have
alot of men now days might kill for exactly what you have is all
I had never been alone since I was around 14
I had someone in my bed every night ,
But when the new fades both grow tired of things they didn't take the time to see (you never really know someone ,you know what they want you to know ,but if they love you enough ,they let you in )
But I never waited that long ,she was pretty ,she was willing to sleep with me
lets move in together
But after a while she is complaining ,I was complaining ,throw in some friends with big mouths and attitudes and soon its a pain fest
I hate this about her ,she hates this about me ,things are said ya can't take back and soon your roommates who hate each other ,to scared to be alone to end it
but no now I am good ,I took 6 yrs to get to know me
and to get over the last one
2 of my ex's and I get along ,soon I am going to attempt to make it 3
Go see her and tell her I am sorry ,even though we both done things wrong
I loved them all ,I don't want any of them hating me forever
when we just picked the wrong models and tried to make them into something they were never meant to be ,and vice versa
Remember ,you are the one who made the post about changing someone
I just gave you some examples as to why I think its a mistake
Get to know them to start with ,and then if you go further
be happy with what you have
alot of men now days might kill for exactly what you have is all