1-50 of 97
Corwinnx · 56-60, M
LOL...I made out with a stripper because Freud told me to.
Youni19 · 26-30, F
I tripped over a hot dog because a clown stole my taco... I luv this
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SW-User
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User Sweet dogs
SweetMae · 70-79, F
I wanted my professor because of these sweet abs.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SweetMae 😂😂 Lucky professor..lol

SW-User
Well...luckily this thing is pure fantasy...🤤
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User hmm,would love to see your results.

SW-User
@bhatjc Lol. ..no, they are awful. .....
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User you can tell me in pm ;)
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
I tripped over Trojan Man because my boobs are amazing
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion Of course

SW-User
@PerfectIllusion Aeris @JRVanguard B.B. Aeris.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@JRVanguard Yes! I can't wait!
Degbeme · 70-79, M
I tripped over a hot dog because I had one too many drinks. 🙄
Degbeme · 70-79, M
@AlienZipper Freud would throw in the towel after a lot of the stuff on here. 😏 Probably go into botany. :p
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@Degbeme Probably burn his couch 😁
sunnydreams · F
I tripped over a bowl of cereal because I needed to pee... actually this isn't too far from the truth. lmao
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@sunnydreams That's taking "organic" to a whole new - and somewhat disturbing - level 😁😂
sunnydreams · F
@AlienZipper Hahahaha Yup;)
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@sunnydreams You silly girl, lol...

SW-User
I licked Trojan man because I love bacon 😩
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User ewww..lol
Nat15 · F
I licked a glass of vodka because I love bacon!
Nat15 · F
@PerfectIllusion Strap me down and read Of Mice and Men to me ;) lol
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Nat15 oh gawd! I'll let you drink vodka and eat bacon instead! 😊
Nat15 · F
@PerfectIllusion Hehe Thank you!!! 🥓🍸
Mondayschild · F
I licked an Easter egg because my cat is an asshole🐱
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Mondayschild Haha.. I just busted out laughing! 😂😂
Mondayschild · F
@PerfectIllusion these are funny😂
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Mondayschild I love them. It doesn't take much to amuse me apparently..lol
TimSummers · M
I made out with Channing Tatum because a clone stole my taco and the voices in my head said so
TimSummers · M
@SW-User You are just jealous! HAHA!!!

SW-User
@TimSummers totally! He's hot!
TimSummers · M
@SW-User I agree!
Noreaster · F
I made out with a bowl of cereal because I'm awesome in bed. Ok!

SW-User
I beat my best friend because the voices in my head said so.

SW-User
@Elandra77 he likes it 😂
@SW-User Dang!! Then keep listening to those voices.

SW-User
@Elandra77 I do hahaa!
I wrestled an easter egg because a clown stole my taco 😰
@UndeadPrivateer NOOOOOO!!!!!
UndeadPrivateer · 31-35, M
@Dewms Way of the Mango Master it is. 😌
@UndeadPrivateer much better!!!!

SW-User
I cuddled with Burt Reynolds because the voices in my head said so
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User sorry buddy! 😛

SW-User
@PerfectIllusion haha I love these stupid things :)
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User me too. They make me laugh!
Elysian · F
I tripped over a stripper bc im awesome in bed. (True) lol
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Elysian lol..sounds believable!
Elysian · F
@PerfectIllusion 🍒🍒
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Elysian 😉
swl2jo · 56-60, M
and happy bday this week
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@swl2jo Thanks so much! 😊
I licked Cookie Monster because I'm sexy as fuck. Which is only partially true.
Noble · 56-60, M
I beat a volleyball because I like be bacon.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Noble uh huh.. I have a halo too. See.. 😇
Noble · 56-60, M
We’re just a couple of angels 😇😇@PerfectIllusion
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Noble Probably shouldn't stand too close to one another, our horns will become entangled.. halo, I mean our halos!
fun4us2b · M
No shirt! 😱
fun4us2b · M
@PerfectIllusion I thought maybe you lost it in a card game! Sounds like you're having fun under there
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@fun4us2b nah.. I always play my cards right! 🃏😉
fun4us2b · M
@PerfectIllusion As good as you are, when you least expect it you can lose your shirt...👚
Icarus16 · 51-55, M
I ate a landmine because of these sweet abs
Socialclutz · 36-40, M
I made out with a teletubby because I love bacon
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Socialclutz It's Tinky Winky I just know it!
Socialclutz · 36-40, M
😂 🤣 hows you guess? 🤣
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Socialclutz I'm kinda smart like that! 🤓
waterman1005 · 56-60, M
I wanted a glass of vodka because the voices in my head said so!
akindheart · 61-69, F
omg. i tripped over a stripper because i am sexy as f***. funny
sciguy18 · M
I tickled the toilet because the voices in my head said so...
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@sciguy18 eww.. you better get some help or some antibiotics! 😂😂
Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
I got naked with the Trojan man because of these sweet abs.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Fungirlmmm lol.. it happens! 😊
Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
@PerfectIllusion :)
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PhoenixPhail · M
I made out with a candied yam because the voices in my head said so.
Mmiker · 46-50, M
Happy belated birthday
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
I made out with an Easter egg because I love bacon....
Well that explains my breakfast fetish...hmmmm...
Well that explains my breakfast fetish...hmmmm...
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@AlienZipper I could say so much.. lol
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@PerfectIllusion Aahh...go ahead and say it, lol...
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
I ate a hotdog because of these sweet abs
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion well I like that philosophy haha, no baggy t-shirts for you then?
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@AlphaPuppy I don't know why I read that completely backwards! I think it's time for bed..for real..lol
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion aww ok, well sweet dreams

SW-User
missing u
PhoenixPhail · M
I made out with a candied yam because I am PURE CLASS.
Tryingtofindabalance · 36-40, M
I made out with a tooth brush because of these sweet abs
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Tryingtofindabalance lol
Tryingtofindabalance · 36-40, M
@PerfectIllusion looking in the mirror in the morning, how can one resist?

SW-User
I ate a cookie monster because I'm awesome in bed🤣
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User 😂😂 I don't know whether to say I'm sorry or congratulations. Lol

SW-User
I'm surprissed😯
lol
lol
waterman1005 · 56-60, M
I wanted a glass of vodka because of these sweet abs
Mondayschild · F
I licked a purple Easter egg because I needed to pee😄
@Mondayschild A lot have that issue. lol
bhatjc · 46-50, M
I ate a porn star because the voices in my little head said so
Magenta · F
I tickled Aristotle because my boobs are amazing. 😊 😄

SW-User
I’ll try and remember your birthday 😉. Maybe get a wee tickle too 😈 @Magenta
Ccrider63 · 70-79, M
I ate a porn star because I love bacon.
Joker · 41-45, M
I made out with a teletuby because I needed to pee. Btw perfectillusion... your a tease!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Joker uh huh.. good excuse! Just keepin it real because I don't..lol
Joker · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion that’s flippin sexy! Like I said... tease🌹💋
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Joker hehehe.. 😇
goagainsttheflow · 31-35, F
I cuddled with the toilet because a clown stole my taco!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@goagainsttheflow eww.. I can't even imagine. I hope you were drunk!

SW-User
I wrestled a mop because I’m sexy as fuck.. LOL

SW-User
Lucky mop 😛. @SW-User

SW-User
@SW-User LOL!!! 😊

SW-User
Can I be your mop some times 😈. Lol @SW-User
IndyJim · 51-55, M
I licked some mayonnaise because the voices in my head said so

SW-User
I licked a bowl of French fries because my boobs are AMAZING😂
Itsmrsockmonkey · M
@SW-User good reason!! Lmao!!
wyolatex · 41-45, M
I licked a candied yam because the voices in my head said so!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@wyolatex oh yuck!
wyolatex · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion Tell me about it!

SW-User
I wrestled the toilet because I needed to pee.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User Did you really have to cause such a scene? Why didn't you just pee? 🙄
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
Lol i got naked with a porn star because I love bacon
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion can two guys be naked together and eat bacon without it being gay?
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@WeighedDown Hmm.. 🤔 Depends on if you share your meat. 😂
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion lol,
TryingSW45 · 51-55, M
"because I licked the toad"... That does not put me in a happy place
BeefySenpie · M
Stop killing dogs please :(
newgirl · 56-60, F
I licked a golfball because my boobs are amazing!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@newgirl 😂😂
Some1Else · M
I shot a Kardashian because the voices in my head said so!
And it was the right thing to do!
You guys owe me!
And it was the right thing to do!
You guys owe me!
1-50 of 97